This is a post inspired by Erniesurn’s blog post and a consolidation of my comments on his blog.

It has been 44 years since our expulsion from the Federation of Malaysia. Singapore has come a long way since then, and on National Day, I stopped and asked myself – Do I feel a sense of belonging to Singapore?

Frankly, there is hardly any belonging as far as I am concerned. The place I lived for 26 years is now nothing more than a grass patch – the flats were torn down about a few months ago. And the place I spent my childhood from 5 ~ 12 years old (the Kreta Ayer – Upper Cross Street – Chin Swee Road area) has gone through so much changes, I could not really recognise the place – especially the Chinatown area.

Singapore changes so rapid that when I look out of my office’s window everyday I see a drastic change at Marina Bay. Yet all of the developments driving these changes is geared for ‘instant gratification’ – from the IR, to the F1, and the Sail, etc. All of which are targetted at ‘high spenders’, and it doesn’t matter little, or perhaps even none of that money really flows into the pockets of the common man.

The Sail, for e.g., is out of reach of the average Singaporean. As for the F1, whatever benefits there are to Singapore is probably negligible to the common Singaporean. Yet, consider who bears the cost? Common Singaporeans like you and I will have to live with chaotic traffic, bus re-routes and road blocks for the duration the F1. (I wouldn’t even want to get started raving about how the shops in SunTec / Marina area bore the burden of bad business during F1 and get none of the benefits!)

To me, none of these things would make me feel more at home, nor give me a sense of belonging. I simply console myself that whatever revenue that comes of these would hopefully translate into some GST credits for me.

While on the topic of the IR and the new waterfront, I recalled a proposal sometime ago to build a replica of the ship which took Raffles to Singapore. I am not surprised the idea never took off. The reason is quite obvious – what revenue would a floating history museum and an antique ship replica bring to Singapore? In fact, it probably doesn’t even fit into the plan for this so-called new waterfront. In general, historical heritage and preservation of historical buildings in Singapore is a joke – just take a look at the MICA building at the junction of Hill Street and River Valley Road, or some of the old shop houses along Telok Ayer, Tanjong Pagar, or Chinatown itself. It is as if we managed to preserve the carcass in its full glory, but failed utterly to retain its living soul.

Frankly, the Singapore Tourist Promotion Board knows for a fact that once we remove the figures of transit, the figures for visitors in Singapore will be so pathetic, that there is almost non-existent tourism to speak about. Don’t believe me? Try visit the Bird Park or the Zoo on a weekday and see the visitors. Then compare that to the Ocean Park in Hong Kong, when you get to visit it. In fact, I find it easier to promote Taipei and Hong Kong to my own fellow citizens, than to foreign friend from Taipei and Hong Kong to come to Singapore.

If you are wondering just what is the point I am trying to make, it is simply this: Everything in Singapore gives me me nothing more than a feel that we are merely transitional. As a resident and a citizen, I can’t help but feel a sense of loss when something I have attached to gets demolished and then rebuilt – such as the Tiong Bahru Market. There is no doubt if you take Raffles or General Yamashita through time, none of them would recognise the Singapore they know.

It doesn’t help, when I am further reminded that anyone is considered useless if he has no economic contribution to this nation, either in the form of labour or spending. It really never surprises me why Singaporeans readily raved against any proposal of ‘welfare’ even before we have heard of the details! The real reason isn’t really all about ‘welfare encouraging laziness and free loaders’, but this: one more person fxxking up would simply be one less competitor.

Indeed, Singapore has progressed much, but at what expense? Did we really gain something, or lost something? Student suicides were almost unheard off to this old fossil when I was a student. My friends and I were hardly any less entertained or unhappy when I was a kid, in spite of the fact that we didn’t have PSP or Andy’s Ass NDS. The best arcade games were Galaxian or Space Invaders, and Ultima IV was the closest game we had to Diablo, and it is not even networkable! Yet, we were thoroughly happy and we enjoyed our childhood catching longkang fish in the drain, playing marbles or catching, flying a kite or even looking for fighting spiders in the plants at the seemingly abandoned power relay stations.

Yet in spite of the progress we have made, in spite of the luxuries we enjoyed, I seemed even more unhappy. In fact, we ranked even below the Philippines on the Happiness Index or something like that. What am I really unhappy about? Is it a lack of material possessions, or the absence of social consciousness?

I will admit, I am quite unhappy as far as material possession is concerned. In fact, I am definitely upset not only because some of the things are really out of my reach – such as an apartment in the Sail at the new Downtown – probably no matter how hard I try, but also because of the increasing burden in getting them into my possession. My father took 10 years to own the home he bought – it was nothing to boast about but I am still paying another 15 years for mine, 10 years after I have moved in.

I am even morey upset with the absence of social consciousness. I recall the day when a few of us was jaywalking and dashing madly across in spite of the oncoming cars, and then this person in front of me who just got on the divider didn’t bother to step aside so I can step on it, even when he knew I was right behind him. It was there and then I came to the stark realization that in this country, even in matters of life and death, no one gives a damn about the person beside or behind him once he’s safe.

This same I am safe and I don’t give a flying damn about you attitude is prevalent everywhere. Ever come across the guy who after stepping into the train or an elevator, stop right there and not move in in spite of the rest of the rest of the people behind him? Or that person who stopped right on the landing after he step off the escalator in spite of the oncoming load of other passengers? Or the two scums who walk in a line abreast under the corridors of old shop houses in Chinatown or Boat Quay, and yet expect you to give way to them?

In fact, whenever we read the papers about Tai-E-Loan (大耳窿 aka loan shark) problems plaguing some residents, had we stop and consider that had everyone more social consciousness, we would have taken turns to look out for one another and put an end to all these loan shark nonsense? After all, it’s not like these thugs that were arrested were really mean looking gangsters or something. Some of them were just teenagers! I recalled the NPCC (National Police Cadet Corps) used to form Crime Watch groups during my school days, whatever happened to those?!

What national identity and belonging are we talking about when even our closest neighbours are complete strangers to us? A Chinese teacher once said Singaporeans are all ‘bird people’ and we thought he was using bad words. Yet, what he meant was that we lock ourselves up behind our steel gates, like little birds in their cages when we get home.

Is it not true we mostly don’t even talk to our neighbours? Some of us may pride ourselves of having Malay friends but we hardly speak to our Malay neighbours. Is it a surprise why the Kampong Spirit in Singapore is dead?

I can’t help but feel, the Education system in Singapore is a completely failure if we go strictly by Confucius definition of the purpose of education. Confucius believed in educating people so that they know how to ‘be people’ (做人), to understand the meaning of being a human being (做人的道理), to be in harmony with society, and to serve one another. Yet our education system teaches us none of that.

Our education system simply programs the next generation of youngsters to become the labor (or living automaton) which the economy required. Educational institutes would be providing courses towards what is required and taking in most students for them. In 1988, it was high tech manufacturing. By 1998, it was IT. In 2003 it was Bio-Technology. Today, in view of the IR and a service orientated economy, it is service and entertainment. It is quite alright when you are the early batch… but what if you are the late batch where what you are trained in becomes sunset industry in the rapidly changing economic environment of Singapore? Your parents may have spent a whole load of money to get you equipped with these skill sets. But what use are these skill sets when they ‘expire’? Did I mention that my diploma was only good for the first 3 years of my employment before I changed line, when I saw where the wind is blowing?

Simply put, if you haven’t jumped ship before it sank, you are simply, finished! You are stuck with an obsolete skill set or even an education that is a complete waste. If you have been in a particular line for quite awhile… there’s no chance of taking it overseas either since the company would have taken your job to another country where you simply can’t compete with their pay scale. If you just graduated, you probably have no money and yet you have to spend more money to upgrade… or starve.

If you think you are safe being an entrepreneur or a businessman… it brings to memory a friend’s father, who runs a small business making paper bags, boxes and stuff like that. He had several sons gainfully employed in the family business. Yet the business could no longer sustain itself, when provision shops, supermarkets and hawkers rapidly moved into using styrofoam boxes and plastic bags. It was simply a matter of changing times.

In short, I really want to feel belong to this country. Unfortunately, in spite of all the apparent prosperity, I can’t when I look at the direction that the country takes either leaves some of us behind or marginalises them. And this will be what the rest of your fellow Singaporeans and this government gahmin say to you:

The gahmen can claim that it created the job that I have, but it is the skill and ability of the Singaporean worker that keeps the job here. That same job, faces competition also from foreigners coming from elsewhere to seek employment, and foreigners who would leave at the sign of trouble.

In short, I can find nothing to make me feel I belonged. And no one cares. In fact, I know what people who has only smell the roses – and none of the manure in the flowerbed – all their lives, like Wee Shu Min, would be saying if they happened to read this.

Get out of my elite uncaring face, you useless bum.

Funny Picture of the Day: