This piece of shit was published on VOICES on Monday’s TODAY.

Haven’t we already seen this before?

What else can we expect from the gover-min and civil serpents? When these people are the mind and muscle behind some of the stupidest policies on this corner of the planet, it is not unexpected of them to rise up and defend their own crap ideas. It’s probably the same reason why they WOULDN’T vote for the opposition which constantly criticise and point out ‘Why the Emperor isn’t wearing anything?’ to everyone. Simply put, would you slap yourself in the face and admit what you are working for sucks by voting for the opposition?

Anyway, this mail is quite masterful in spite of its distastefulness. In one stroke, it REMINDS TODAY on what it should do to be a good newspaper. In another, it attempts to muzzle Mr Brown just like Lao Goh muzzles Catherine Lim.

All the above being said, Singaporeans should also give this the middle finger -> providing constructive feedback and alternatives.

Constructive criticisms? What for? They hear but they do not listen. Constructive criticisms are simply implicit approvals. Stop that nonsense. As for critics, they have got no need to give alternatives or solutions. After all, critics didn’t boast to have helicopter vision and aren’t paid a million bucks a year. And if they did come out with a workable alternative and solution that didn’t get shot down right away, will the incompetent currently on the job resign and let the person with the new idea take his pay and his job? And make sure the assh*le who got fired doesn’t end up in NOL or some GLC / TLCs to ensure he get a taste of what it is like to be jobless.

One should remind the Tali-PAP that criticisms are FREE. And if they want alternatives, their very own million dollar incompetents should pay with their jobs and their pay!

By the way, silencing Brown is the dumbest thing to do. A lot of Singaporeans basically won’t take their blog the way Brown has taken his, or speak their mind just like Brown did. In other words a lot of people would simply keep their mouth shut because what Brown wrote speaks their mind on the particular matter. To silence Brown would means these people will find their views unexpressed, and would inspire some to thus take it upon themselves to take up Brown’s mantle. Just like killing Zarqawi, a whole new group of people – more vicious and direct in their criticism – will rise up in his place. It is my personal opinion that leaving Brown alone to keep the rest silence would also create the impression that there’s very little dissent. But it is not that I object to more people making their dissent known anyway.

Here’s another blogger’s tribute to Mr Brown, and the least I can do is post it here:

The Stupid Shitty-Porean Award

– that ‘genius’ MIKE SU YI TING wrote the letter ‘Fertilisers in Orchard sure stink’ to the Stooge Times Forum. He wrote: “However, the fertilisers used along the stretch from Orchard Hotel to Shaw Centre have caused a stink and turned Orchard Road into the ‘Great Singapore Smell’. The authorities should get rid of this unpleasant stench immediately. Otherwise all the effort will go down the drain.” (Wah lan eh! Got people life too good cannot even stand a bit of fertiliser smell. Perhaps only the kind that comes out of his own arse won’t stink. It begs the question why the Stooge Times editors actually saw it fit to publish such a stupid letter!)

The World This Week

– that Warmonger again vowed to complete U.S. military missions in Iraq and around the world as the U.S. honoured its war dead with the military toll in Iraq closing on 2,500 and a report of more reinforcements for the west of the country. Tears welled in his eyes as he gave a speech at Arlington National Cemetery on Memorial Day, just a few days after admitting that he had some regrets about the Iraq conflict and that it had caused ‘consternation’ in America. (The next President may not have the same resolve.)

– that Warmonger Bush signed into law a bill that keeps demonstrators from disrupting military funerals. In advance of his speech and a wreath-laying at the U.S.’s most hallowed burial ground for military heroes, Arlington, on Memorial Day, Warmonger signed the Respect for America’s Fallen Heroes Act. The law is largely in response to the activities of a small Kansas church group that has staged protests at military funerals around the country, claiming the deaths symbolised God’s anger at US tolerance of homosexuals. The new law bars protests within 300ft of the entrance of a national cemetery and within 150ft of a road into the cemetery. This restriction applies an hour before until an hour after a funeral. Those violating the act would face up to a $100,000 fine and up to a year in prison. (Some people are deluded. God is usually more precise in his wrath.)

– that Warmonger Bush said he was ‘troubled’ by allegations that U.S. Marines killed unarmed civilians in Haditha, Iraq, and vowed that if crimes were committed, the guilty would be punished. “I am troubled by the initial news stories,” Warmonger said at the White House after a meeting with Rwandan President Paul Kagame, who was visiting Washington. “If, in fact, laws were broken, there will be punishment,” Warmonger said, adding: “Those who violated the law, if they did, will be punished.” The Bush Administration Regime has promised full public disclosure of the findings of military probes into the alleged killing of at least 24 civilians by U.S. Marines in Iraq. (From No Gun Ri to My Lai. From My Lai to Haditha.)

– that Warmonger Bush said he wanted to close the Guantanamo military prison but first needed a plan to deal with the ‘darn dangerous’ prisoners held there. Mr Bush acknowledged that the camp, which has drawn international condemnation, gave some ‘an excuse’ to criticise the U.S. for failing to uphold the values it espoused. (Well, the one dick and one bush in the White House is too ‘darn dangerous’ too.)

– that a Pentagon document classifies homosexuality as a mental disorder, decades after mental health experts abandoned that position. The document outlines retirement or other discharge policies for service members with physical disabilities, and in a section on defects lists homosexuality alongside mental retardation and personality disorders. Critics said the reference underscores the Pentagon’s failing policies on homosexuals, and adds to a culture that has created uncertainty and insecurity around the treatment of homosexual service members, leading to anti-homosexual harassment. (What maybe irking is that if you put women into the armed service with men, the women may get sexually harassed. Put homosexuals into the armed service with men, and the heterosexual men are the ones that might end up sexually harassed.)

– that the U.S. gover-min paid for sports season tickets, a sex change, a Caribbean holiday and even a divorce lawyer as up to $1.4 billion in aid for alleged victims of hurricanes Katrina and Rita was misused, it was revealed. In one case, FEMA paid an individual $2,358 in rental assistance, while at the same time paying about $8,000 for the same person to stay 70 nights at more than $100 per night in a Hawaii hotel. The $1,000 payment was only one example cited in a catalogue of scams. Prisoners, a supposed victim who used a New Orleans cemetery for a home address and a person who spent 70 days at a Hawaiian hotel, all were able to get taxpayer help, according to evidence that further damages the U.S. disaster relief agency. The abuses came to light as officials from the Gover-min Accountability Office (GAO) testified before a House committee on their findings. (Thanks for all these shitheads for showing us why a welfare system doesn’t work and some people should be left to rot.)

– that Dickhead Cheney rebuffed a call for a pre-emptive missile strike to knock out a long-range missile that North Korea has been preparing for launch.Former defence secretary William Perry urged the U.S. to strike the North Korean launch site if Pyongyang does not take steps to stop the launch, insisting Washington act rather than allow a ‘mortal threat’ to develop. (Did someone check if this wasn’t an impersonator?)

– that the Air Force general responsible for building a U.S. anti-ballistic missile shield voiced high confidence it could shoot down any U.S.-bound missile from North Korea, despite critics’ doubts. “From what I’ve seen from our testing from the last several years … and what I know about the system and its capabilities, I’m very confident,” Lt. Gen. Henry ‘Trey’ Obering told reporters after a speech to a seminar. (Sure. Maybe he should tell the North Koreans where to aim at, and have himself tied to the ground zero where the Taepodong-II with a nuke is going to hit to demonstrate his confidence.)

– that most Australian women think bra shopping is as annoying as a visit to the dentist, according to a researcher from Melbourne’s Monash University. Dr Yelena Tsarenko from the university’s Department of Marketing said despite advertising that marketed bras as fun, 59.2% of women surveyed in October last year found buying them unpleasant, only 24.7% liked the experience. (The men accompanying them would probably enjoy it more… ogling at the women.)

– that bright lights in bra shops also were a turn-off, with more bodily flaws visible, Dr Tsarenko said. If they are over 20 years old, then they are more sensitive about their body,” Dr Tsarenko said. She said she suspected soft lighting would make women more likely to buy a bra. (And the men says, “Bright lights good. Soft lights bad.”)

– that anti-whaling campaigners vowed to continue attempts to stop the mammals’ slaughter, even though opponents failed to overturn an international hunting ban. Activists from the pressure group Greenpeace say Japan’s failure to win backing at the International Whaling Commission’s (IWC) annual meeting in the Caribbean did not mean they could be complacent about protecting whales’ safety. (Indeed. Above which they should get Japan to reveal just what scientific research they are doing with those whales they have hunted other than turning the meat into human waste.)

– that calling himself ‘a son of Germany’, Pope Benedict prayed at the former Nazi death camp of Auschwitz and asked why God was silent when 1.5 million victims, mostly Jews, died in this ‘valley of darkness’. (Was He truly silent, or just that people turned a deaf ear to His call to prevent the slaughter of His people?)

– that in his speech, the Pope twice uttered chilling German phrases the Nazis used for some enemies – ‘lebensunwertes Leben’ (life unworthy of living) for gypsies and ‘Abschaum der Nation’ (scum of the nation) for anti-Nazi Germans. (There are no more unworthy scum than the Nazis themselves.)

– that the regional gover-min of North Rhine-Westphalia, Germany’s most populous state, has slammed plans by German insurance giant Allianz to axe nearly 7,500 jobs in its domestic insurance and banking divisions as ‘incomprehensible’. “It is incomprehensible to me how the group is treating its employees. The job cuts affect the fate of many thousand employees and their families. You can’t make such announcements without telling employees what will become of them. If they treat employees like that, you have to ask yourself how they treat customers,” the regional state premier Juergen Ruettgers said. (So what do you suggest, Herr Ruettgers? Allianz to cut jobs from their other branches overseas to stay competitive and profitable while keeping a bunch of dead weight money wasting f*ckwits employed in Germany?)

– that Airbus has increased the sale price of its A380 superjumbo, whose problems have triggered a management crisis at parent company EADS. Airbus said the price of all its models – including the A380 – rose two weeks ago in a standard annual increase. The disclosure of a six-month delay to delivery of the A380 has thrown its Franco-German parent firm into turmoil. (How about first attempting to deliver on time before talking about raising prices?)

– that ‘Islamic’ militias now in control of the Somalian capital have fired guns in the air and cut electricity to makeshift cinemas to prevent Somalis watching the World Cup. The Islamic Courts Union broke up gatherings to watch the football matches. A strict interpretation of Islamic law often bans western films and television as immoral. (Is there a better reason why these shitheads should never win? Imagine that killing non-believers is alright but watching soccer is immoral. It’s the next worst thing to eating shit.)

– that police in Chechnya killed rebel lea-duh Abdul-Khalim Sadulayev during a special operation after one of his inner circle was paid £30 for disclosing his hiding place. Sadulayev was killed in his hometown of Argun about nine miles east of the provincial capital, Grozny. An intelligence agent and a police officer were also killed in the operation. (A modern day Judas! £30 compared to 30 silver coins!)

– that the Hamas gover-min wants a ceasefire with Israel and is willing to ask Palestinian militants to stop firing rockets from Gaza into the Jewish state, a spokesman said. But Ghazi Hamad said Israel had to first stop military activity in the Gaza Strip and the West Bank. (And when the ceasefire is violated, blame splinter groups, right?)

– that an Egyptian explosives expert who trained with Abu Musab al-Zarqawi in Osama bin Laden’s camps in Afghanistan is the new face of al-Qaida in Iraq, the U.S. military says. Abu Ayyub al-Masri took over the cell after a bomb killed al-Zarqawi, Maj. Gen. William Caldwell said, displaying a photograph of a bearded man in a traditional white Arab headdress. The military spokesman said al-Masri was the man identified in an Internet posting by al-Qaida that said Abu Hamza al-Muhajer was al-Zarqawi’s successor. The name, a nom de guerre, means ’emigrant’ in Arabic and suggested he was not an Iraqi. (If these shitheads would stop making a mess in Iraq, the Americans would probably have gone home by now.)

– that an American army medic tried to save the life of the terrorist Abu Musab al- Zarqawi minutes after a bombing raid blew apart his safe house. But the scum was suffering from ‘massive internal injuries’ from which he could not recover, the U.S. military said. A U.S. military doctor said Zarqawi died 52 minutes after two 500lb bombs blasted his hideout north-east of Baghdad and that a post-mortem examination showed his injuries were consistent with those caused by a bomb blast. (Why bother stopping him from getting his 72 ‘white grapes’ for a ‘job well done’?)

– that a suicide bomber wearing an explosives belt struck a home for the elderly in the predominantly Shiite city of Basra, the police said, one of a series of attacks that killed at least 16 people and wounded dozens. Haider Ahmed Hamid, an 18-year-old Sunni from Basra, blew himself up inside the building as a group of elderly Iraqis were lined up at a window to collect their monthly pension, said a police captain, Mushtaq Kadhim. Two elderly women were killed and three people – two men and a woman – were wounded. A parked minivan also exploded at a busy outdoor market in the Shiite slum of Sadr City in Baghdad, killing seven people and wounding 22. (They should just let the innocent public beat every caught terror bomber to death.)

– that Saddam Hussein ended a brief hunger strike after missing just one meal in his U.S.-run prison, a U.S. military spokesman said. The former Iraqi lea-duh had refused lunch in protest at the killing of one of his lawyers by gunmen, but the spokesman said he ate his evening meal. Former Saddam aides being held in the same prison had refused to eat three meals but ended their fast with the ex-president. (Makes one wonders if this guy ever fast during Ramadan.)

– that terrorist Ayman al-Zawahri urged Afghans in an Internet video to fight foreign troops in their country whom he said had a history of denigrating Islam. The 3-minute video, which was posted on a Web site often used by militant groups, showed Osama bin Laden’s right-hand man speaking directly to the camera with an automatic rifle propped up behind him. (Afghans should also fight foreign troops that justifies murder in the name of Islam.)

– that terrorist Ayman al-Zawahiri vowed in a videotape on Al-Jazeera television to avenge the death of the terror network’s Iraq frontman Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, killed in a US air raid June 7. (Hopefully there won’t be any to avenge this shithead when he goes.)

– that India’s top court has refused to ban the Da Vinci Code film, saying no country with Christianity as a dominant religion has taken such a step, reports said. (Why bother? It’s just pure and simple fiction. Let the fools who would believe it is true do so.)

– that students ruffians at a Chinese university set fires and smashed equipment in a protest over power cuts during World Cup games. Up to 9000 students ruffians took part in the protests at Sichuan University in the country’s southwest. A university official said the midnight power cuts were deliberate to ensure students got enough rest. (Rascals, ruffians and spoilt brats is what I would call these losers.)

– that Japan has warned North Korea against testing a ballistic missile, saying it would set back efforts to normalise diplomatic relations. A flurry of reports in East Asia and the U.S. have indicated that the communist regime is planning a long-range missile test. (Japan should even invade North Korea to help kick start the unification process of the Korean Peninsula.)

– that embattled Chen Shui-bian will not bow to opposition demands to step down even if his son-in-law is convicted of insider trading, the president’s top aide said. “The president is president and his son-in-law is son-in-law. The president would not step down even if his son-in-law Chao Chien-ming is convicted,” chief presidential secretary Mark Chen told the Taipei Foreign Correspondents Club. “Chao is not a member of the First Family and therefore there is no reason to ask the president to shoulder responsibility for what Chao has done.” Chen Shui-bian has apologized for the turmoil caused by his son-in-law and insisted that the case be handled in accordance with the law. (Look shithead, few would have participated in that money grabbing scheme of his if he wasn’t your son-in-law! Your influence has a lot to do with it so stop shirking from being responsible for what happened.)

– that speaking in the Minnan dialect to consolidate his pro-independence supporters, Chen Shui-bian defended his presidency in a live televised address, calling an opposition-backed move to remove him from office completely groundless. In a two-hour speech, he also defended his wife, Madam Wu Shu-chen, who is under investigation over an influence-peddling scandal. Mr Chen’s public defence came before the island’s legislature begins a debate today over a motion to recall him. (A 2 hour speech saying that there are those before him who are even worse is really quite a defense.)

– that the political party of Thaksin Shinawatra was found guilty of violating election law, probably ending his career. The Thai Rak Thai party hired small parties to run in the 2 April election to ensure it won a majority. (This guy stops at nothing to gain power.)

– that controversial ‘Muslim’ cleric Abu Bakar Bashir Ba-shit has been released after 26 months in an Indonesian jail, completing his prison sentence for giving his blessing to the 2002 Bali nightclub bombings that killed more than 200 people. Bashir’s release was greeted by hundreds of supporters outside the prison. He is expected to travel by car to his hometown, a small village outside Solo. (That’s Indonesia’s commitment to anti-terror for you.)

– that Indonesian authorities informed the IMF of plans to repay in advance about US$3.7 billion in debt, half of its debt to the institution, the IMF said. The repayment would be made during the week ending June 30, the IMF said in a statement. Bank Indonesia governor Burhanuddin Abdullah said on June 5 that Indonesia may settle all of its outstanding debt to the IMF by December. (If there were less corruption, would this have happened earlier?)

– that dUMNO has given its vocal backing to Prime Minister Abdullah Badawi, who faced criticism from Mama-thir. Following a meeting of dUMNO’s Supreme Council, DPM Najib Rezak said Abdullah had its ‘unanimous’ support. But dUMNO did not go so far as to censure Mahathir for his remarks. (Mama-thir should learn a word called – retirement. Otherwise he should learn the purpose of a post called ‘Senile Monkey’ or ‘Monkey Mentor’.)

– that Matthias Chang, the former political secretary of Mama-thir, has come under fire for swearing on the Quran when he held a press conference last week. Malaysian Syariah Lawyers’ Association president Zainul Rijal Abu Bakar, demanding Mr Chang’s apology, said syariah law stated that non-Muslims should not touch the Quran, much less swear upon it. (A deserving fate for a overly eager and overly enthusiastic lackey.)

– that Chang swore on the Quran and four other holy books when he stated that he was telling the truth while speaking for Mama-thir. The lawyer had challenged dUMNO Youth deputy chief Khairy Jamaluddin and New Straits Times deputy group chairman Kalimullah Hassan to debate controversial issues recently raised by Mama-thir. Putera dUMNO head Abdul Azeez Rahim said Chang had displayed little respect for the various religions in Malaysia. He also said Mr Chang should not ‘tread on dangerous ground’. (Go! What are you waiting for? Bring out the sedition laws!)

Singapore This Week

– that according to Mabok Tongue, the upgrading patching and refurbishment of our older public-housing estates is over and above the basic obligations of the gover-min – i.e. to provide all Singaporeans with good and affordable health care, subsidised discounted public housing, equal opportunity to receive a good more and more expensive education, etc. It is funded out of Budget surpluses generated by the Tali-PAP gover-min. No other gover-min in the world has anything similar, in terms of scale and commitment. (How did those budget surplus came about? Fruits dropping off the money tree?)

– that upgrading patching and refurbishment is a ‘national’ * erhem * programme that will be implemented in ‘all’ constituencies. It is prioritised, due to limited resources. It is not a question of generosity or otherwise by the gover-min. Between Tali-PAP and opposition constituencies, other things being equal * some being more equal than other *, Tali-PAP constituencies will go first, as the gover-min had made clear before the election. (Sure, make it transparent as to how some of these constituencies are really equal, but they only go first because they are lackeys.)

– that the police are investigating allegations that blogger Char, 21, published offensive caricatures of Jesus Christ on a website. The cartoons may be deemed to be inciting racial hatred, which is punishable by a three-year prison sentence. They first appeared in January – about the time cartoons of the Prophet Muhammad raised anger in the Muslim world. (Someone must have thought sedition charges to be funny. They should whip his sorry asses too even though Christians are forgiving people who wouldn’t be screaming for his head on a platter.)

– that poor Mr N. STANLEY JEREMIAH was fined by the MDA for having a ‘broadcast television receiver without a valid licence’ when he had not had any television set in the house from at least last year. When he called up Licensing Services (Broadcasting), this was what he was told, “You did not inform us that you did not have a television set, so you have to pay the fine.” (Make sure you inform these mofos – aka muthaf*ckas – when you get rid of your TV set and not replace it.)

– that statistics from the KK Women’s and Children’s Hospital show that average height of children in Singapore is going up. The height of a three-year-old girl may range from 87cm to 101cm, and the height of a four-year-old girl may range from 94cm to 109cm. Parents are thus asking for the height limit for free rides on public transport to be raised. Overall, the height of girls under seven in the 50th percentile has also increased, from 157cm in 1988 to 159cm in 1993. But public transport companies here say this is not possible as huge costs would be incurred. (* YAWN * Every time, they will say that. Record profits, dude. Time to spend them, asswipes.)

– that in Beijing, China, the height limit for free bus rides and other perks for children was recently raised by 10cm to 1.2m. That is because children in China, like in Singapore, are getting taller. (Some would say China isn’t doing the sensible. It is just doing what socialist countries do. Perhaps. But again, it is better to be sensible than ‘cent-s-ible’.)

– that TransitLink Tran-shit-Link explained that if the height limit were to be raised above 0.9m, there would be huge costs incurred to change all the fare gates and sensors throughout the MRT and LRT system, and this would adversely impact the full-fare paying commuters. (First, no lifts on every floor and now needs us to co-pay for ‘upgrading’ the lifts because of population ageing. I can overlook that, since then they don’t have the helicopter vision to demand their million dollar paychecks. Now, don’t expect anyone to come out with a single cent to correct this oversight, ok?!)

– that as for public buses, Tran-shit-Link says all concessionary fares are cross-subsidised by full-fare paying commuters. There is no travel concession subsidy granted to public transport operators. It is therefore in their interest that public transport operators exercise prudence when granting any further travel concession beyond the present arrangement. (It is therefore also in Singaporean’s interest that married couples exercise prudence when they are considering a baby.)

– that LTA says it will work with the public transport operators to see if there is a case for adjusting the concession policy for children. But it adds that concession schemes are decided by the public transport operators, which operate on a commercial basis, and any decision to improve on or grant more concessions is a matter for transport operators to decide. (No. It is the LTA’s and the Mini$ter of Tran$port’s responsibility to get down to fixing this oversight. And don’t expect us to pay for it! Or else, resign and return every single cent for the non-existent helicopter vision that we paid for.)

– that Singapore was placed a dismal 30 out of 35 cities in a Reader’s Digest courtesy test, showing it still has a long way to go – even after more than a quarter century of courtesy campaigns. New York finished tops in the three tests: holding a door open, saying ‘thank you’, and helping someone pick up dropped items. Joining it at the top were Zurich in Switzerland and Canada’s Toronto in second and third place. Languishing at the bottom of the list with Singapore were South Korean capital Seoul, Kuala Lumpur, India’s financial centre, Mumbai, Bucharest in Romania, and Moscow. (When a ‘me first’ attitude has always been encouraged – e.g. vote me so you upgrade first, education streaming – is it a surprise we are all f*cked up?)

– that netizens are incensed by a mobile phone video clip of three teenage girls assaulting another girl at what appears to be an HDB staircase landing. The victim was kicked, slapped and punched by her assailants, who yanked her shirt off and pulled down her tube top to expose her breasts. During the 4.5-minute-long clip, which is making the rounds on the Internet, a voice can be heard giving instructions on how to bash the girl. There were also giggles and laughter during the beating. (It is like watching a pack of hyenas picking on a downed animal. Any human being with some dignity left in him / her will have aimed for one of the bullies and push her down the stairs together. Darth Grievous suggest the sterilisation of these bullies immediately, and also their entire bloodlines to prevent further pollution of the genepool by these filthy scums. HEIL!)

– that freak flood strikes the Novena MRT station, which was flooded by 5cm of water at one point. (Too bad the mini$ter$ is not there to witness and enjoy the latest add-on to their vaunted ‘World Class’ transport system for common Singaporeans.)

– that Stiff Chia has some blunt advice for new NCMP Sylvia Lim and her Workers’ Party (WP): A higher profile in Parliament does not mean success at the next general election. In remarks to the Chinese freesheet My Paper published, he noted the rise of the WP at this year’s election. He said that based on his own experience, serving as NCMP will raise an individual’s profile, but it may not necessarily translate into votes. Singaporeans may also not vote for the WP even if it fields candidates of high quality or who have been an NCMP. This is why he believes that Ms Lim, the WP chairman who was declared as NCMP after the May 6 election, will share a fate similar to his. (Well, it is highly unlikely Sylvia will pose nude, take photos of her own maid or beat the traffic light, Stiff.)

– that Chiam See Tong has written to the National Development Ministry asking for access to $80 million in funds that had reportedly been earmarked for upgrading in the constituency. In a letter to Mabok Tongue, he referred to comments by Lao Goh and media reports during the election campaign about an $80 million upgrading programme for the ward if the Tali-PAP won it. (Wait long long lah, Chiam. You think that Mabok will give it to you?)

– that Chiam, who released his letter to the Stooge Times, said he was also making the request on behalf of Tali-PAP voters in his constituency. (He should advise them to go live in Tali-PAP strongholds like Marine Parade, Ang Mo Kio or Tanjong Pagar.)

– that foreigners have to be more than just ‘native speakers’ to qualify as English teachers in Singapore schools, said the Ministry of Education (MOE). It said this in response to concerns by some Singaporeans, who have expressed their misgivings in letters to The Straits Stooge Times ever since Education Mini$ter Tharman $hanmugaratnam said native speakers may be brought in to strengthen the teaching of the language. (It is an insult to many dedicated local English teachers. And being a self-learn guy for many things, including learning to improve my written skills and increase my knowledge of English vocabulary through reading more English books, it is quite a joke to believe that an ang-moh will increase the English proficiency of Singaporeans. We might as well return to being a British Colony if that’s the case.)

Trivial, Jokes and Thoughts from Discussions

– that Bill Gates, the world’s richest man, said he would give up the daily running of Micro$oft by July, 2008 to concentrate on his foundation’s work tackling health and education problems. Gates ‘will transition out of a day-to-day role in the company to spend more time on his global health and education work at the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation’, Micro$oft said in a statement. The Micro$oft co-founder wanted a two-year transition ‘to ensure that there is a smooth and orderly transfer of Gates’ daily responsibilities’. It added that Gates, 50, would continue as the company’s chairman and an ‘advisor on key development projects’ after July 2008. (Did Gates, like Greenspan, see what is coming and his inability to stem the tide, and quit, before the tide consumes him?)

– that a paparazzo was arrested after he was discovered hiding in bushes outside a daycare center attended by Angelina Jolie’s adopted son, authorities said. Clint Brewer, 25, was trying to take pictures of 4-year-old Maddox Jolie-Pitt, according to Cindy Guagenti, a publicist for Jolie’s partner, Brad Pitt. (Can these shitheads stop feeding the public with such crap so that the desire for such information will ultimately die off?)

– that ‘Blow Me’ Clinton traveled the globe in 2005 giving speeches that earned him $7.5 million, according to financial disclosure documents his wife, Hillary, is required to file annually. The Senate released the financial disclosure statements. Clinton’s speaking fees mark an almost nine-fold increase from the $875,000 he earned in 2004, when he spent much of the year writing and promoting his memoirs and later recuperating for several months from heart bypass surgery. (That’s probably enough money to let him get a Monica a day.)

– that the ‘Google generation’ of students often do not understand what plagiarism is, says an expert on the issue. Many of the new generation of students raised on the internet see nothing wrong with copying other people’s work, says Professor Sally Brown. Prof Brown, of Leeds Metropolitan University, will tell an international conference that the net has made copying and pasting too easy. (Odd. It’s not like in the past we don’t just read someone else’s book and copy text off them.)

– that a new pair of moons orbiting Pluto were officially christened by the International Astronomical Union, which is in charge of approving celestial names. Nix and Hydra are the newest kids in the solar system. (It’s a good thing we have only one moon. Can you imagine your wife having menses as many times as there are moons?)

– that the Earth is the hottest it has been in at least 400 years, probably even longer. The National Academy of Sciences, reaching that conclusion in a broad review of scientific work requested by Congress, reported that the ‘recent warmth is unprecedented for at least the last 400 years and potentially the last several millennia’. A panel of top climate scientists told lawmakers that the Earth is running a fever and that ‘human activities are responsible for much of the recent warming’. Their 155-page report said average global surface temperatures in the Northern Hemisphere rose about 1 degree during the 20th century. (My fan has been working overnight ever since late April so tell me about it.)

– that soccer fans are being warned about a malicious worm that uses world Cup themed e-mails to infect Windows PCs. The Sixem-A worm is spread in messages with subject lines such as ‘Naked World Cup game set’ and ‘Crazy soccer fans’. Once installed, the worm attempts to disable security software, leaving the computer open to further attack. Security firms advise computer users not to open e-mail attachments unless they are expecting them and to keep security software up to date. (After the Anna Kournikova virus, you would have thought that people would learn.)

– that the top 25 nouns are: time, person, year, way, day, thing, man, world, life, hand, part, child, eye, woman, place, work, week, case, point, government, company, number, group, problem, fact, and the most popular word overall is the, followed by be, to, of, and, a, in, that, have and I. (What?! Sex and fuck didn’t make it to the top 25?)

– that a reptile with a shell or bony plates, is called a chelonian. (That’s a new word for me. It was as exciting as the day I learnt the word ‘arachnid’, and found out that spiders and scorpions aren’t insects.)