What is coolness?

Is Jay Chou cool? Is having an iPod cool? Is having a PSP cool? Is dyeing your hair with rainbow colors cool?

Well, Jay Chou is cool. Not the ones who imitate him. The iPod and the PSP is cool, but not all those show-offs with one. And dyeing your hair is an utter mess, but if that makes you cool in your head, well, you are cool.

So what exactly is ‘cool’ all about?

Cool doesn’t mean wearing a pair of torn jeans with hello kitty patches like everyone else. Cool doesn’t mean you go put 5 or 6 pins into your upper lip because your i-duh did it. Cool doesn’t mean you put on this jacket and keep a beard and look like Wolverine from X-Men.

Cool, simply means something that impresses everyone, but is such a tough act to follow. Being cool is unique. Being cool cannot be imitated. Being cool is a creative self expression. Therefore, some people are cool, and some people are not. And some people never will be.

So, Jay Chou is cool. But if you imitate him, then you are nothing but a pathetic moron. It simply shows you to a brainless f*ck completely lacking in originality and personality. In other words you are a hopeless f*ck trying to be someone else’s f*cking clone. And when you can’t copy his genes and his brains then even in that you have failed and that’s so completely un-cool. Not to mention being a clone’s about as cool as all those Darth Vader and Obi-Wan Kenobi toys that rolls out of some Chinese factories or every other Corolla that rolls out of Toyota’s factories in Japan.

Owning an iPod and PSP doesn’t make you cool. Oh yes, the device is damned cool, but anybody who can own one if he can fork out the money. And it doesn’t cost someone an arm or a leg to do so, thus what’s the big deal? You want to buy something to make you cool? Go buy the Freedom of the Seas! Or built your own version of Air-Force one complete with your own layout! Oh yes, that’s so cool because I can only dream about it.

For e.g. if Gold-dick Porn-Actor shows off his 12 inches long member with thumb tacks on it, he is damned cool because he’s probably going to make himself like God’s gift to women when he does it. But he’s going to be a damned difficult act to follow. First of all, stick thumb tacks onto my gold member, the most sensitive part of the body? Ouch! Won’t it be really painful? And what happens if the thumb tacks start to rust? What about infection. Oh yes, Gold-dick Porn Actor, you are damned cool.

And by now, if you still don’t know what ‘cool-ness’ is all about, you are beyond redemption. But hey, being a blockhead is cool too because I would find it damned difficult to be one myself. Bwaghahahaha…

Talking about blockheads… it reminds me of someone who is completely clueless as to why people are upset with him. And all he could do is point fingers and lay blame on others for his own predicament, while failing to look at what he has done to cause the unhappiness. That reminds me of the kind of a**hole who says, “I am an a**hole because all you a**holes caused me to become one!”

Hmm… maybe I should write a Birdy Sermon on: A**holes. When I am in the mood to, that is. Akan datang.