The Ugly Singaporean Award

– that ‘genius’ CHIN YONG KIAT wrote to TALK on the SUNDAY TIMES: “No one is obliged to give up his seat to anyone on a bus. It is out of goodwill that people do so. Everyone pays a fare for the journey. The undergraduates in question were not given free rides. If Madam Yvonne Lee really wanted a confirmed seat, she should have taken a cab. Secondly, being an undergraduate myself, I can understand that some students may be too tired to offer their bus seats, especially after rushing out assignments or projects the night before. People should not expect that seats be automatically given to them just because they are carrying a child.” (Let us all give a round of applause to the Singapore Education System for creating such a fine specimen of a kriffing selfish heartless prick. Chin should be condemned to a life of standing on public transports, carrying a weight equal to the child Yvonne Lee is carrying and banned from cars and cabs for life! Otherwise, one of these days his future wife should be standing on the bus carrying his child and complaining to him about heartless undergrads not giving up their seats. And yes, I believe in poetic justice and excessive retribution.)

The World This Week

– that the long-term threat of an avian flu pandemic could be greatly reduced by a project to produce genetically modified chickens that can resist lethal strains of the virus. British scientists are genetically engineering chickens to protect them against the H5N1 virus that has devastated poultry farms in the Far East, with a view to replacing stocks with birds that are not susceptible to influenza. (Someone pointed out that this is something that probably nature could do on its own if we stop culling all the birds. And talking about bird flu and I recalled now that some are saying that dinosaurs are actually birds not lizards, I wonder if the dinos were actually wiped out by a prehistoric bird flu. And well, maybe they have dug up too many dinosaur bones that they released this old scourge back into the living world. Hiak! Hiak! Hiak!)

– that a radical animal rights activist shocked members of the U.S. Senate by advocating the murder of those conducting medical research. Jerry Vlasak, spokesman for the Animal Liberation Front, told the Senate Committee on Environment and Public Works that killing medical researchers was ‘morally justified’ to save laboratory animals. (It is also ‘morally justified’ to exterminate this moron to save teh researchers. And no, I don’t think it is justified, I am just using the same shit values of a piece of shit on itself. I suppose it wouldn’t object to its own moral standards.)

– that the Bush administration regime has abandoned for the upcoming year its bid to research ‘bunker buster’ nuclear weapons, which Congress struck from the budget last year. The Pentagon will instead focus on developing a conventional deep-earth penetrating bomb, said Senator Pete Domenici, who chairs a Senate appropriations sub-committee overseeing nuclear weapons. (God spoke again to Warmonger Bush recently?)

– that Hurricane victims who wanted water had some difficultly finding it at a relief station in Clewiston. The volunteer group running a supply center doesn’t like the company that donated the water, so they decided not to give it to those in line for help. Twenty-two pallets of the canned water, distributed free by beer company Anheuser-Busch, bears the company’s label – and members of the Southern Baptist Convention refused to hand it out to those in need. (Water is water. Damn you Pharisees. It is not for you to question the holiness and righteousness of the donor, but if you really want to help then help to meet the needs of the needy people.)

– that Chevron joined the eye-popping profits parade of astronomical oil profits. The U.S. no. 2 oil company reported earnings of $3.6 billion. The totals only get bigger: Conoco Phillips made $3.8 billion, BP made $6.5 billion, Royal Dutch Shell made $9 billion and Exxon Mobil raked in a whopping $9.9 billion in just three months. All the oil profits is fuelling consumer outrage. (Well, it appears that prices of certain daily necessities shouldn’t be allowed to be determined by market forces.)

– that a conservative Canadian MP has discovered through documents obtained under Access to Information that Status of Women Canada has been funding anti-Christian bigotry and pro-abortion activism. However, in a startling exchange of correspondence, the Minister responsible for the funding neither offered to pull the funding nor to apologize to Christian Canadians for funding Pro-Choice Action network (pro-CAN) which defame them. Pro-CAN spokesperson Joyce Arthur is noted for using derogatory labels to describe individuals who are pro-life, saying their opposition to abortion, ‘comes primarily from religious justifications for oppressing women’ and a need to ‘maximize (the Catholic Church’s) membership levels to maintain their worldly influence and wealth’. Pro-CAN accuses pro-life Christians of being ‘religious fanatics’ who do ‘little or nothing for children once they are born’. She says pro-life Christians are ‘anti-woman and anti-child’, have views which are ‘uninformed, sexist, cruel’ and lack the ability to empathize which ‘breeds intolerance, hate crimes, and war’ Arthur says that the pro-lifer’s attitude towards women is like ‘the slaveholder’s attitude to blacks, and the Nazi’s attitude to Jews’. (This is so funny. That very last part describes Joyce Arthur’s attitude to Christians perfectly. In Singapore, we put such idiots to jail for SEDITION.)

– that Prince Charles will try to persuade Warmonger Bush and Americans of the merits of Islam this week because he thinks the U.S. has been too intolerant of the religion since September 11. (Is Richard the Lionhearted rolling in his grave already?)

– that four suspected terrorist youths were detained by Danish police in a Copenhagen surburb on suspicion of planning a suicide terror attack in Europe, are all of Middle Eastern Origin. “One of them has Danish nationality and the three others grew up in Denmark, but we do not yet know for sure whether they are naturalised Danes,” police spokesman Joern Bro said. He declined to give details of the planned attack, saying on that the network the four – aged between 16 and 20 – are suspected for belonging to had been planning an ‘imminent’ attack on a European Union capital. (It’s high time the EU consider reintroducing the death sentence for such lowlives.)

– that in the fatwa, titled ‘A Treatise on the Legal Status of Using Weapons of Mass Destruction against Infidels’, Sheikh Shit Nasir bin Hamid al Fahd rules that international law should not be taken into consideration while determining if America should be nuked. Islamic law, he says, overrides all man-made laws. To the question of whether a nuclear attack would violate the Islamic teaching that ‘the basic rule in killing is to do it in a good manner‘, al Fahd argues that this teaching means that one should only kill in a good manner ‘when one can’. He goes on to say that it is permissible in certain circumstances to kill women, children, and fellow Muslims for the sake of jihad. (It’s time to ‘terra-form’ this shithead’s mouth and whatever crap that makes up for brains in his dumb skull with radiation or some kind of acid.)

– that Iran’s president has defended his widely criticised call for Israel to be ‘wiped off the map’. Attending an anti-Israel rally in Tehran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said his remarks were ‘just’ – and the criticism did not ‘have any validity’. (America wiped out Babylon, but Persia rose in its place. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad intends to provoke Israel into attacking his nuclear reactor. Perhaps he should be concerned that it might be his Revolutionary Guards and reactors that will be ‘wiped off the map’.)

– that Iran has vowed it has no intention to attack Israel and it will keep to its international engagements as laid out in the UN charter, the IRNA agency reported. “The Islamic republic of Iran is committed to its engagements based on the UN charter and has never resorted to, nor threatened to resort to force against another country,” the foreign ministry said in a statement quoted by the IRNA agency. However, the ministry expressed surprise that the Security Council did not condemn the threats of military action made against Tehran by the United States and Israel or the ‘crimes’ of the Israeli regime. (Well, they have never threatened to wipe anyone off the map, for starters.)

– that Mahmoud Abbas asked Warmonger Bush during his White House meeting to pressure Israel into releasing from prison the alleged architect of the 2000 intifada and founder of one of the most deadly Middle Eastern terror groups, a senior ‘Palestinian’ official involved with the talks told WND. “Abbas asked [Bush] for several things, including the freezing of Israeli settlement activity and to help with the release of our prisoners,” said the official, speaking just minutes after the conclusion of the White House meeting. “A special request was made for Israel to release [convicted terrorist Marwan] Barghouti.” (Israel should release him and then send the helicopters to give this criminal against humanity the ultimate in freedom of soul from body.)

– that Abu Carmel, a senior West Bank lea-duh of the terrorist Al Aqsa Martyrs Brigades, reportedly involved in the attack said the recent blast just north of Tel Aviv was ‘legitimate’ because all Israelis are ‘military targets, they are not civilians’. (An Israeli officer doing the same about the ‘Palestinians’ would face court martial and international condemnation but the scum who said this is viewed as a hero of his kind. That probably explain why the Israelis get more international support than these losers.)

– that Abu Carmel emphasized his group considers Jews living anywhere in Israel legitimate military targets. “Only the ‘Palestinians’, who get killed every day, are innocent civilians,” he said. (The only legitimate target now is Abu Carmel Camel.)

– that in retaliation to the recent attacks, Israel fired a rocket at two senior Islamic Jihad terrorists in northern Gaza, also reportedly killing four other Palestinians. Jihad pledged ‘harsh retaliation’. (Harsh retaliation against those who are defenseless. How about someone raping your 80 year-old grandmother because he can’t get back at you, you kriffing scumbags?)

– that Al-Jazeera, the Arab news service growing by leaps and bounds worldwide and spreading its reach into the western world, has a new name for suicide bombings – ‘Paradise Operations’. (One such operations should be conducted on Al-Jazeera right away to bring them paradise.)

– that an accredited Arabic-language translator spied the new phrase in the current issue of the Arabic-language news site. In a story about the Russian foreign minister criticizing the ‘Palestinian’ Authority for failing to combat terrorist movements, a paragraph reads: “Ariel Sharon ordered the defense minister Shaul Mofaz previously to undertake wide attacks on the movement of the Islamic Jihad, whose military wing yesterday undertook (am-ma-li-a al cha-deer-ra) operations of paradise, which killed five Israelis and injured tens of Israelis – or whoever was standing around.” Previously suicide bombings have been called ‘ammaliat in-ta-har-i-a’ – suicide operations. (They should be called for what they are – cowardly terrorist mass murder of innocents.)

– that Donald Rumsfool warned that the pace, scope and secretiveness of China’s military buildup has led other nations to question whether its intentions are peaceful. In a speech Rumsfool gave to students at a school that grooms future Communist Party lea-duhs, he laid out U.S. concerns about the lack of political openness in China. (Are American intentions peaceful when it has the ability to project its might to all parts of the world?)

– that Japan has agreed to the stationing of a U.S. nuclear-powered aircraft carrier there in 2008 when the conventionally powered USS Kitty Hawk is brought home for decommissioning, a U.S. navy official said. The Japanese gover-min notified the Diet of the move, according to the U.S. navy official, who spoke on condition of anonymity. “We’re taking a nuclear powered aircraft carrier and putting it in Japan, and bringing back the Kitty Hawk in 2008 for decommissioning.” (Confuse us says: “To bark loudly, one needs a fierce master. Or the fox can stand in front of the tiger.”)

– that when asked to choose the most desirable place to mourn the dead, 42% of those polled picked the Yasukuni shrine, followed by 33% who opted for building a new national memorial. 17% said they would favour Yasukuni if top war criminals enshrined there were removed. (As if those who remained are saints and angels? How many of those actually died defending Japan and not invading some other places? All of those must be removed too.)

– that in the center of Pyongyang floats a commissioned vessel of the U.S. Navy. The USS Pueblo, a spy ship captured by the North in 1968, is moored on a bank of the Daedong River. Despite quiet U.S. moves in recent years to secure its return, the vessel still functions as tourist attraction, trophy and symbol of anti-American struggle. By no coincidence, the Pueblo is moored on the spot where the first Korean-American interaction took place. In 1866, an armed American steamer, the General Sherman, was destroyed on the Daedong with all hands aboard after it attempted to force trade with Korea. According to a modern tablet at the site, the man who led the attack was none other than the great-great-grandfather of the country’s late lea-duh, Kim Il-sung. (And Attila the Hun and Genghis Khan are all related to Kim Il-Sung too.)

– that chen Shui-bian faced a growing political storm as his former adviser, already the subject of a corruption probe, was found to have violated policy by visiting a casino during a foreign trip. The ruling Democratic Progressive Party (DPP) has called a special session for today to discuss penalties for Mr Chen Che-nan – who is not related to the president – for gambling in South Korea, even as investigations continued into his role in a subway project. Prosecutors are investigating allegations that Mr Chen Che-nan used his influence as a presidential adviser to help the Hua Pan business firm improperly win licences to hire foreign workers for a subway project in the southern city of Kaohsiung. (It’s time to put an end to the disastrous 6 years under DPP rule.)

– that terrorists in the southern Thai province of Pattani attacked a Buddhist temple, hacking a 76-year-old monk to death, shooting two teenage helpers and setting fire to the bodies as well as part of the temple complex. The pre-dawn attack, involving about 20 terrorists who used assault rifles, knives and machetes, fireworks and petrol, was the first attack of its scale on a Buddhist temple – though not the first killing of a monk. (Whatever justification these criminals against humanity originally had, it no longer matters. They should be wiped out, indiscriminately.)

– that 3 girls have been beheaded and another badly injured as they walked to a Christian school in Indonesia. They were walking through a cocoa plantation near the city of Poso in central Sulawesi province when they were attacked. This is an area that has a long history of religious violence between Muslims and Christians. It is unclear what was behind the attack, but the girls attended a private Christian school and one of the heads was left outside a church leading to speculation that it might have had a religious motive. (The entire place should be cleansed with napalm to rid it of these religious bigots.)

Singapore This Week

– that Singapore is all ready to tackle any bird flu pandemic, with a rapid disease outbreak response system in place. ‘Khaw Bey’ Wan said the gover-min has upped preparations, including building up its stockpile of anti-viral medication. Having learnt from the SARS crisis, Khaw says the key to fighting avian flu is through international cooperation and gearing up for a major outbreak at home. (And let’s home there will be no need to test that ‘readiness’.)

– that Singapore is standing by its decision to hand down the death penalty to a convicted Australian drug trafficker as it sends a strong message to drug syndicates. “Our strict anti-drugs laws send a clear message to drug syndicates not to conduct their criminal activities in Singapore or through Singapore,” Singapore High Commissioner to Australia Joseph Koh said in a statement. (Standing firm on the rule of law, as far as criminals are concerned, regardless if they are local or foreign, is one of the few things I am proud of Singapore.)

– that the Public Transport Council Bill has been amended to give the council greater powers. This means it can direct transport operators to adjust fares and in the case of a downward revision, rebates will be given. (I don’t want no kriffing rebates. Just tell us to pay less.)

-that offenders caught underpaying or not paying the correct bus fare will have to pay a penalty of $20. If someone is caught abusing concessions for students and senior citizens, the penalty will be $50. Refuse to pay that, and you will face a $500 composite fine. The final legal recourse of a six-month jail term and $2,000 fine for repeat offenders remains only a remote possibility. (And what’s the penalty for the bus companies if the system screwed up?)

– that Yeo Cheow Tong Lam Cheow Kong told Parliament that the $9 million lost by public transport companies to fare cheats is an accurate figure. (Well done Singapore! We are a nation of cheats according to Lam Cheow here.)

– that Transitlink said that based on ticket inspections carried out by the public transport operators, an average of about 1.5 cases of fare evasion are detected on every bus trip checked on a trunk service. As there are 2,800 trunk buses making about 10 trips per bus per day, an average of 42,000 cases of fare evasion is derived. Compared against the total number of 2.3 million passenger trips made on trunk buses every day, this works out to be 1.8% of the trips. Given that the average amount of fare evaded is 60 cents per case, the annual figure works out to an estimated $9 million. (I learn that the word ass-timate estimate is now synonymous with average in the Singaporean context. If, there is an average of 1.5 cases of fare evasion for x number of checks, that means there’s an average of ‘some astronomical number’ of fare evasion based on this number of trunk buses, that number of trips et al. I have always consider that an estimate, not an average. So, there are 120 reported cases of wrong deductions a day. When that wasn’t taken as an average but as the real value of wrong deductions per day, don’t expect us to think of this blasted crappy system as fair.)

– that the high-profile dispute between Singapore Airlines and Air Line Pilots’ Association-Singapore (ALPA-S) has been cited as a violation of trade union rights by an international body. The International Confederation of Free Trade Unions’ (ICFTU) was also troubled by an amendment to the Trade Union Act that took away a union member’s right to have the final say in negotiations with the management. The criticisms appear in the confederation’s latest annual survey of 137 countries around the world. ICFTU noted in the report: “The amendment to the Trade Union Act … meant that union members no longer had the power to accept or reject collective agreements negotiated between their union representatives and the employer. (It is a joyous occasion to know that the only real union left has now been defanged / castrated and is far less a full tiger / man. But usually eunuchs [太监] matured damned fast. After all they are all little boys before castration, but after castration they are all grandpas [公公] already. [Note: In Imperial China, eunuchs are generally addressed as ‘公公’.])

– that Singapore has inched up seven spots in the 2005 World Press Freedom Index, released by international association Reporters Sans Frontieres (RSF). The Republic is now ranked 140th out of 167 countries, one place behind the Philippines, and not very far away from North Korea, Nepal, China, Vietnam and Myanmar which are at the bottom of the rankings. RSF attributes Singapore’s low ranking to ‘the complete absence of independent newspapers, radio stations and TV stations, the application of prison sentences for press offences, media self-censorship and the opposition’s lack of access to the state media’. (It’s a miracle they even bothered to rate Singapore.)

– that it’s a double celebration with Deepavali and Hari Raya Puasa, but shopkeepers at the two main bazaars in Little India and Geylang Serai are not celebrating. They say overall business has dipped some 20% compared to last year, while many shoppers are also tightening their belts. Shopkeepers are keeping their fingers crossed that things will pick up with last-minute shoppers. (Despite the rosy picture of the economy painted by the media, stocks are down and people are tightening their belts. Which is the true representation of state of the economy?)

– that ‘genius’ MAYUR VORA complained that his son has only a week to prepare for NS because his A Levels will be over in end-November and his call-up is in early December. He argued that after studying so hard for two years, surely the students need a break of at least two weeks before the call-up. (Actually, after studying hard all these years, all these ‘golden jackfruits’ should be excuses from National Service, isn’t it? Let the un-educated and the poor do NS. Bah!)

Trivial, Jokes and Thoughts from Discussions

– that a Norway rat was set free on the tiny island of Motuhoropapa off the coast of New Zealand. For the next four weeks, conventional rat-trapping techniques were employed – snap traps, live traps and waxed devices – without success. After 10 weeks, the radio signal was lost. Then the researchers found rat feces on the island of Otata, 1,300 feet (400 meters) away across the open ocean. The DNA was a match, confirming a suspicion scientists had, that rats were good swimmers. The elusive creature had made the longest confirmed open-water crossing of any rodent in history. (Is that the rodent equivalent of swimming the English Channel?)

– that once there was someone who recommended spraying water on inconsiderate smokers who disobeyed the ban of no smoking in taxi queues, bus interchanges etc. (Actually, just use a flame thrower. If they light to light up so much, let’s light them up too.)

– that hundreds of people flocked to a village in central India on 20 October to see if an astrologer who forecast his own death would indeed die as predicted. But the 75-year-old man survived the day. Kunjilal Malviya, who lives south of the Madhya Pradesh state capital Bhopal, had been meditating in his house after announcing he would die between 0930-1130 GMT that day. (In ancient Israel, he would have died anyway, though he would have missed the timing by a little. The Israelites would have stoned the false prophet to death.)

– that Malviya’s prediction is not the first of its type by an Indian astrologer. But in the past, crowds have beaten up astrologers when their predicted demise failed to occur. (Maybe that’s what he was hoping for. Be beaten to death.)

– that issuing fines to those with expensive cars who parked illegally is insufficient to deter them. (Yep. First wheel clamp their cars. After which, impound their cars and have their cars sent to a pound in Jurong Island. Then have them go their personally to get it back and charge them $500 plus GST – for the trouble taken to tow the vehicle to the pound and for wheel clamping. If they want the car delivered back to them, charge them another $200 plus GST for the delivery, but they must first send the key to the traffic police HQ first. It will be returned based on schedule and it normally takes 3 days. And for everyday they don’t take their car back from the pound, charge them $50 plus GST for storage. If not collected within 90 days, the car will be auctioned off as scrap to Natsteel to pay for the charges incurred. Any shortfall will be billed to the owner, at an interest of 24% p.a. will be charged if the bill is not settled in 30 days. All these not including the fine for illegal parking. Offenders will also have their photos posted on the Internet for 90 days. That should teach them never to park illegally again.)

– that from mervkwok’s blog, it was reported that xiaxue xiasuay lost two endorsements, one from Kimage and the other from Voxy. It seems like xiasuay got too carried away with her assumed ‘goddess’ status and was alleged to have posted a potentially seditious piece that ‘Christians-are-stupid’, along with some disparaging remarks about KL, Malays and Arabs, and handicapped toilet users. This obviously incurred the wrath of several other bloggers. One of them was alleged to have sent an email to Kimage protesting this and Kimage promptly dropped her in a matter of 2.5 hours. (If it’s true, all hail Kimage for their efficiency.)

– that according to a friend who bothered reading her diatribe, he hasn’t read anything with racist or anti-religion nature when digging through xiasuay’s blog. Apparently it has been removed for good. Self preservation is obviously ‘the better part of valor’. (Or else it would be sedition. Seems like she wouldn’t be gloating about others ‘worshipping the ground she blog on’ for awhile. Heh.)

– that what she actually wrote two weeks ago on her blog was that the loos for handicapped people – bigger and equipped with a sink – were not just for the use of disabled people. Her blog entry also criticised a ‘rude’ disabled person in Ginza Plaza who had scolded a man for trying to use the loo for the handicapped. (There are certain stupid things that you can choose not to do, like not giving up your seats to old folks and pregnant ladies, but anyone who goes around telling people to do the same, justify their excuses of not doing it, or make noise about old folks or pregnant ladies being rude for demanding the seats, are not just plain inconsiderate, they are just simply dumb. They are losers.)

– that according to another friend who reads her blog diligently, xiasuay hasn’t lost either endorsements. This is what she sent to me, allegedly from the xiasuay blog: “Voxy will still be sponsoring my nails (I haven’t decided if I will go though), while Kimage hasn’t stopped the endorsement, but have just requested for the link to be taken down temporarily. (Yes, I misunderstood them too)”. (No need paiseh lah. Lost it means lost it. If not go sue SPH for misinforming the people lah.)

– that the SUNDAY TIMES reported that hair salon Kimage and nail studio Voxy pulled their ads from xiasuay’s blog this week, after receiving complaints from Netizens about her remarks on loos for the handicapped. Only T-shirt maker LocalBrand is staying. (So xiasuay says one thing and SUNDAY TIMES says another. After Davinder Singh ripped several new assholes for Durai, I am convinced that the papers are always telling the truth. Meanwhile, what the heck is LocalBrand? Some consumer action – to inform Localbrand of the consequences of endorsing bad role models – appeared to be necessary.)

These are some of the bloggers’ take on xiasuay’s stuck-up attitude: Peter Tan’s Blog Shaolin Tiger Kimberly Cun #1 Kimberly Cun #2 Kimberly Cun #3 Sandrapowderpuff #1 Sandrapowderpuff #2 Xialanxue Mooiness More links can be found on Peter Tan’s Blog Personally speaking, I must say these bloggers’ outburst are really justified. Man, if your friend opened someone else’s toilet door and got scolded, he deserved it. You should teach him to be careful. And if he comes out of a handicapped toilet and gets scolded, and you think why the handicap can’t wait like everyone else for a few minutes, then perhaps ask your friend why didn’t he wait the few minutes for the non-handicapped ones too. There’s a limit to bimbo-ness and acting cute but this time xiasuay is really stretching it and asking for it. In Cantonese we say, 抵死啊！！[Literally translated as: Deserve to die!]

– that Christopher Ng Wai Chung, 30, has a financial reserves that far exceed those of his peers. The figure is about $250,000, made up equally of cash and CPF savings, he says. He has arrived at this enviable position by saving and investing over the six years since he started work as an engineer. Cheered by that, he has written a book, Growing Your Tree Of Prosperity, which is an introduction to investing for newbie investors. (Dear Chris aka Modeus, some of your long lost friends, such as I, will be calling you very soon. Your number didn’t change hor? Considering the money you will be making from your book, I don’t think lunch at Fullerton about $250 will cost you lah hor? Not even 1% of your entire fortunre lah!! Oh yah, can you endorse my blog too?)

The World This Week

– that Warmonger Bush dined in the famed French Quarter of New Orleans, to meet with local leaders on rebuilding the city and other communities devastated by Hurricane Katrina. (Forget about the blasted levees. Just fill in the hole and build a new one on top of the ruins.)

– that Syrian Interior Minister Ghazi Kanaan, who was questioned over former Lebanese Premier Rafiq Hariri’s murder, committed suicide in his Damascus office. Earlier in the day, Mr Kanaan, 63, spoke to Voice of Lebanon radio to make a ‘final declaration’ and deny Syria’s involvement in Mr Hariri’s murder. “This is going to be the final declaration that I can make,” the former military intelligence chief for Lebanon, where his country deployed troops for three decades before their withdrawal in April, told the radio station. (Mea Culpa!)

– that ‘Palestinian’ television featured a senior PA academic, Dr. Hassan Khater, founder of the Al Quds Encyclopedia, saying the killing of Jews is mandated by the prophet Muhammad. Khater, quoting what he said was Islamic tradition, told viewers, “Muhammad said in his Hadith: ‘The Hour [Day of Resurrection] will not arrive until you fight the Jews, [until a Jew will hide behind a rock or tree] and the rock and the tree will say: Oh Muslim, servant of Allah, there is a Jew behind me, come and kill him!’” (Now I am utterly confused. Isn’t Islam a religion of peace? So where does this genocidal piece fit in, or did this Khater make it up?)

– that there are speculations if Osama bin Laden’s secret lair crumble in the earthquake that devastated northwest Pakistan. However, U.S. gover-min officials and terrorism experts caution against too much speculation about whether the al Qaeda chief may have been killed, injured or forced from hiding. (If it did happen it once again reaffirms the meaning of ‘Divine Justice’.)

– that Junk-ichiro Konkz-umi has visited the controversial Yasukuni war shrine that honors the war dead, a move that has prompted outrage from China and South Korea in the past. This is Koizumi’s fifth visit to Yasukuni since taking office in 2001, and he has repeatedly insisted his visits to the shrine are to honor Japan’s war dead, and not to promote militarism. (When most of those war dead, not including the war criminals, died in wars of aggression against other countries, it is hard to accept that honoring them isn’t promoting militarism. So quit trying weasel out of it already, Konkz!)

– that Junk-ichiro Konkz-umi rejected objections by China and South Korea to his war shrine visit, saying foreign gover-mins should not interfere in matters of personal belief. “In principle other people should not meddle with matters of the heart,” Konkz-umi told reporters hours after he visited the Yasukuni war shrine in Tokyo, seen by Japan’s neighbours as a symbol of the country’s past militarism. “Much more, foreign governments should not say ‘you should not’ when the Japanese are offering sincere condolences to the war dead from Japan and other parts of the world,” he said. (Sincere condolences to invaders which rape and pillage most of East Asia. Right. I’ll let my asshole pay its respects to the Yakusuni branch at home every morning.)

– that Chen Shui-bian intensified calls for a massive arms build-up to thwart what he said was a growing military threat from China. Speaking to a crowd gathered to celebrate the island’s National Day, Chen also vowed to continue reforms launched since his DDP seized power in the 2000 presidential polls. (Well, 5 years ago they vowed and did nothing. With about 3 years left what the hell can they do?)

– that Chen Shui-bian’s popularity rating has dropped to a record low of 25% in the wake of a major bribery scandal, a newspaper poll showed. The figure compared with about 34% support that Mr Chen drew a year ago, according to the United Daily News yesterday. (It’s a miracle that he isn’t yet ‘character bankrupt’ [人格破产] by now.)

– that Annette Lu has blamed men for all the evils in the world and urged more women to join politics to achieve peace. “The great forces of nature and the great transformations in the 21st century show us that the structure with men in power is crumbling in many countries,” Ms Lu told a women’s conference. The responses of gover-mins to the tsunami and earthquake in South Asia highlighted the problem, Ms Lu said, according to the Taipei Times. “Ninety-nine point nine per cent of wars are waged by men, so women should join politics and become policymakers because only women bring peace to the world,” she said. (Well, then one of the greatest evils men has bestowed upon Taiwan is definitely by Lu’s father. I don’t have to elaborate lah hor?)

– that Indonesian Vice-President Jusuf Kalla said that the gover-min cannot ban the Jemaah Islamiyah (JI) despite Australia’s insistence it do so – because it never recognised it in the first place. “If we have never recognised the existence of that organisation, how can we disband it?” Mr Kalla was quoted as saying by the Detikcom online news service. (“I can’t treat my wound because I don’t acknowledge that the wound exist.” Just how the hell did this fellow made Vice-President in the first place?)

– that the Bali suicide bombers are still unidentified. Photos released by Indonesian police showed their severed heads, blown off their bodies when they detonated their deadly bombs, their features swollen but clearly recognisable. All three men were between 20 and 25 and looked Indonesian. Twenty-two people were killed and 100 injured in the blasts. (They should just let them die ignominiously – un-named, unknown, reviled and forgotten. And instead of leaving them nameless graves, the tombstone should read: “Here lies a beast in the skin of a man.”)

– that Mama-thir Mohamad is not backing down from his claim that Anwar Ibrahim is a homosexual, setting the stage for a courtroom showdown. (This is bad drama. These two should just enter a boxing ring, try to pummel one another senseless and be done with.)

Singapore This Week

– that 3 day after Mr Ralf Lee caused a traffic jam at Empress Place by parking a Mercedes Benz SLK along a bend in the narrow road – outraging some readers who wrote in to TODAY — he has just this to say: ‘The readers are right. And he is sorry.’ He even agreed with those who said that the $70 fine he paid simply wasn’t enough. (Ralf Lee 知错能改，善莫大焉。Girlfriend can afford car, how come cannot afford carpark?)

– that as a feature in this year’s Road Courtesy campaign, the wave will be road users’ way of saying thank you on the roads. Ho Peng Kee said at the launch of the campaign yesterday that he hopes ‘The Singapore Road Wave’ will become standard practice on the roads here. (When we need campaigns to do even the most common sense of things, there’s really a serious problem with our educational system. We are taught the skills to earn a living, but we are apparently not taught the skills to be proper human beings!)

– that Baby Lee point out in his Nuremberg National Day Rally Speech, those considered poor in Singapore are still in possession of significant wealth, according to a detailed breakdown released by the Singapore Department of Statistics (SingStat). Referring to the household equity of the poorest 20% in terms of per capita household income, Baby had said: “That means the value of the house, subtract the mortgage not paid, this is what it is worth to him. So it’s not bad for the bottom one-fifth to have $138,000 of wealth in an HDB house.” Some 71% of the lowest 20% households, per capita, had equity of at least $100,000 in their HDB flats while 7.8% of this lowest income group had equity exceeding $250,000 in their property. (Ya. Just too bad if they’ve got no money to buy food they can’t eat the bloody house. And if they sell their house to get food they will be sleeping in void decks.)

– that the LTA says that closing some CTE exits may help to improve traffic speeds, but such a move will cause much inconvenience to the thousands of motorists who use these every day in response to a letter of on the TODAY freesheet to close the Braddell exit. (Well, it’s either the inconvenience of going a bigger round, or the inconvenience of having to pay for the ERP. But one of them inconveniences don’t generate any revenue.)

– that media exec Kalin – not her real name -, 21, is glad she made that call because now bloggers know with free speech comes responsibility. She was the person who made the call to the police one Sunday morning in June at 3am. (Confuse Us says: “There is less trouble when people sleeps early.”)

– that this ‘genius’ RETNAM THILLANINATHAN asked why wasn’t the taxi driver traced because he is the culprit who started the chain of events leadng to the two bloggers posting on racists remarks on their own blogs and forum. He said that the authorities did not act fast enough to nab the taxi driver, to drive home the point that it is illegal to transport pets using public transport. (And why can’t pets use public transport? Isn’t the onus on the pet owner to ensure that the pet does not dirty the cab? What has it got to do with the taxi driver? If this was the attitude of the person who complained about the dog in the cab, then now I can understand, though I will not and cannot agree with, the outburst of those two bloggers. Their actions admit no explanation.)

– that this same ‘genius’ that the authorities were also not vigilant enough to detect the bloggers’ racist remarks and urge the authorities to be more vigilant. (The authorities should also be vigiliant in dealing with such intolerance and animal-discrimination too.)

– that another ‘genius’ TAN KHEE SHIAN wrote to the Stooge Times Online Forum and asked ‘Why is there a bias towards Chinese shows on TV mobile?’ and suggest that “SBS Transit should have been more thoughtful and considerate when implementing what it thinks are ‘value-added services’ instead of just focusing on capturing viewership to attract revenues, which shows its myopic profit-mindedness.” (We have come a long way from complaining about the loudness of TV Mobile and its bad quality. Now ‘racism’ is an excuse to justify one’s complaints about TV Mobile! Anyone with enough neurons to make a synapse would have realised that SBS Transit has always maintained that it cost them nothing to implement this ‘value-added service’. And since it is free it simply means that the advertisers paid for it. And can one call that myopic profit-mindedness, when TV Mobile chooses to show stuff that attracts the most audiences, which is TV Mobile’s obligation to the advertisers, who paid to have this service on the bus? When even such simple business acument is non-existent, no wonder Singaporeans are such pathetic entrepreneurs! And above all these whinings, where’s the suggestion on where to get non-Chinese programs to show? So, for goodness sake, TV Mobile is free. Watch it, or don’t. Some people should stop acting self-righteous and trying to be politically correct.)

– that yet another ‘genius’ ALLAN TAN wrote to the Stooge Times Online Forum and talked about how his poor 12-year old daughter was totally shattered by the difficult paper because she could not finish all the questions and panicked in the first hour in the examination when she encountered the difficult multiple choice questions. He asked why are we subjecting young kids to difficult exams set by ‘cruel, insensitive examiners’. (All trials and tribulations are cruel and insensitive. Should I blame God of being ‘cruel and insensitive’ for my share losses, or for having a bad day in office, or for a booked cab not coming on time even when I am going to be late for work, or for some shit thrown my way by a particular idling, tai-chi master colleague? Just face it and move on. If you have a fall because of a hole, cry all you want, learn your lesson then pick yourself up and move on instead of staying at the damned hole and whine about it.)

– that one more ‘genius’ ROSALIND LIM KWANG SUAN wrote this to the Stooge Times Forum: “I agree the major problem faced by most pupils sitting for the Primary School Leaving Examination (PSLE) mathematics paper is insufficient time. The current time frame of two hours and 15 minutes is unrealistic.” She further wrote: “If the purpose of the exam is to assess pupils’ attainment in mathematics at the end of their primary education, then it is only right that they be given a realistic and appropriate time frame to complete the paper. Also, the questions should be set within their ability to solve them.” (Say, increase to 3 hours lah. And if they can’t finish in 3 hours also, then got people say it’s unrealistic, how?! Then half day enough? Or give them all the time they want until they say give up? Why has no one considered an exam also a test to see how people performed under pressure, and a test of EQ and AQ? * vomit blood *)

– that Associate Professor Lee Wei Ling stands by her claim that many Singaporeans are ‘gullible’ when it comes to donations. (The money is others to give and has nothing to do with you, ma’am. Whether they are ‘gullible’ or not is subjective.)

– that the 50-year-old neurologist, who is director of the National Neuroscience Institute, recently penned a letter to the Stooge Times in which she criticised the ‘propensity of the press to sensationalise’ and the gullibility of Singaporeans. She was also ‘disappointed’ with Singaporeans’ ‘unthinking reflex response to stories in the press’. (In the matter of the press, she’s right. All that news about Huang Na, Liu Hong Mei, Constance Chee, Guen Garlejo Aguilar. But whether people are gullible or not they go it out of their own good heart so it has got nothing to do with her at all!)

– that she was critical of several treatments which she deemed unnecessary, such as those of conjoined Nepalese twins Ganga and Jamuna, which were paid for with public money. When the media reported about the twins’ plight, $660,000 in donations poured in for their surgery. In the case of Chen Shuyun, a Batam child whose head was nearly thrice as large as a normal child’s, again the public gave generously, with more than $50,000 raised for the operation. She deems such reactions as ‘misplaced compassion’ due to the media sensationalising these stories. She said in an interview, “I look at repeated incidences where the public wastes large sums of charity money, in response to the press playing up to an audience that does not understand complex medical problems.” (What kind of world is it when even showing compassion is criticised? Personally speaking, I think the brain is such a complex organ that even neurologists don’t understand so can I ask Associate Professor Lee to shut up keep her comments to herself?)

– that she harks back to the murder of eight-year-old Huang Na last year to drive home her point. An undisclosed sum, believed to be a six-figure amount, was collected in bai jing (Mandarin for ‘white gold’), money donated by well-wishers for the girl’s funeral. Reports have revealed that Huang Na’s mother is currently using part of that money to add another floor to her two-storey home in China. “It’s a sensational murder. (There’s) no patient alive to benefit from the generosity, so you give the money for the mother to build a new life. How many other Singaporeans have lost close relatives, some who are sole bread winners, but the death is not sensational, (so) they may get a tiny sum from the social welfare department.” (There are many injustice in the world. So should we all become cold and calculative and in the end even compassion dies in this world simply because there is not enough facts to help us make an educated decision?)

– that in her letter published, Lee had also suggested that the Nepalese twins’ parents’ motives for coming to Singapore was to get more sympathy money. The parents have denied this, claiming that they needed funds to help their children. But, as Ms Angella Cheng, who was the guardian of the twins when they were in Singapore, has pointed out, they have since been unable to account for the $70,000 they received in donations four years ago. This amount is on top of the original $660,000 raised, said Ms Cheng. (But these haven’t got shit to do with complex medical problems anymore, yes? Leave Singaporeans to make their own decisions on these!)

Trivial, Jokes and Thoughts from Discussions

– that Sony has been left red-faced after Australia’s High Court rules that the installation of mod-chips in PlayStation consoles is not against the country’s laws. The chips that allow gamers to play pirated and imported games on their modified consoles are found not to be the primary protection device and therefore not covered by copyright laws. This means that while it is illegal to duplicate pirated copies of games in Australia, it is not illegal to play ‘unauthorised’ discs. (Ouch. That hurts. Because it’s the discs that makes money. Not the consoles.)

– that a lawyer for Boy George has denied that drugs found in the British singer’s apartment belonged to him. The singer, whose original name is George O’Dowd, was released without bail after being charged with fourth-degree criminal possession of a controlled substance. He had called 911 to report that his home had been burglarised at around 3am, said a police spokesman. Officers arrived at O’Dowd’s apartment and discovered a small amount of cocaine next to a computer. (He would need to move mountains and fill oceans to make someone believe that the burglar who broke into his house forgot about his drugs and left it next to the computer.)

– that Boy George faces up to 15 years in prison if convicted on charges of drug possession, while his lawyer said the flamboyant entertainer had no idea how 13 plastic bags of cocaine got in his apartment. (Might as well say they were there since the place was built!)

– that in retaliation, teachers should start blogging, flame and write bad things about their students too. (Hmm.. greatteacheronizuka.blogspot.com sounds like a damned great idea.)

– that I am a ‘racist’ too. Yes. Die, you freaking, slimy, disgusting reptilian shits!! DIE!!! (Sorry for my ‘seditious’ * erhem * outburst and not so flattering comments against the reptilian species. I get really mad when I read news about pythons eating house cats and the likes. ;))

– that Taiwanese actress Lu Ching sobbed as she admitted to having filmed a popular TV host naked in her apartment, but denied she used the video to extort money from him. Lu, 33, an emerging starlet, has not made any public appearance since comedian Peng Chia-chia revealed three weeks ago that he was being blackmailed over a naked video of him. He did not identify the blackmailers, but media reports said she had filmed him at her apartment. (The man likes to play. The woman didn’t like being played without getting paid. And thus a lousy third grade drama surrounding this misdemeanor. It shouldn’t even be news worthy in the first place!)

– that while waiting at the MRT station, a son complained about his father holding him away from the door and telling him not to block the doorway. This was what he said, “I am your son. Why are you treating me like this?” (No one is going to treat you like this as long as you aren’t their kriffing son.)

– that it is a personal opinion that all those opinion about religious tolerance and free practice of religion under the Singapore Constitution on the Stoooge Times Forum is a load of kriffing bull. (How is it tolerance when Christians are asked to tolerate everyone else but whenever a Christian tried to evangelise everyone complain? Evangelism is part of Christian practice and if there are conditions prventing it, then so much for free practice!)

– that a study found that night-time temperatures in downtown Orchard Road were up to 7 deg C higher than those in Lim Chu Kang, the closest Singapore has to a rural hinterland. The maximum temperature in Orchard Road was 30 deg C, while it was 23 deg C in Lim Chu Kang. (And it is damned cold at about 4am in the morning if you are in Sungei Gedong Camp.)

– that this female elephant’s left foreleg was seriously hurt after treading on a landmine at the Thai-Myanmar border. It received care at Hang Chat Elephant Hospital in Lampang province, 510km north of Bangkok. Vets operated on the two-year-old elephant to cut away dead flesh and shattered bones, using enough anaesthetic to floor 50 humans. (Damn the blasted landmines and the shitheads who put them there.)

The Ugly Singaporean Award

– that a 46-year-old male beast, obsessed with oral sex, had abused the young daughter of his friend since she was five years old. Facing 11 charges, the former driver – who cannot be named to protect the identity of his two young daughters – was sentenced to 21 years in jail and eight strokes of the cane for repeatedly making the girl he was babysitting perform oral sex on him. (This is another one CJ Yong should do something about.)

The World This Week

– that Florida businesses could soon face criminal charges if they try to stop employees from bringing guns to work in their cars, thrusting the state into a growing national debate pitting individual freedom against job safety. Backed by the National Rifle Association, two state lawmakers have filed bills that would allow workers to have guns at work, as long as the weapons remain locked in their vehicles. (And what’s there to stop them from taking the guns out of their cars?)

– that Warmonger Bush allegedly said God told him to invade Iraq and Afghanistan, a new BBC documentary will reveal, according to details. Warmonger made the claim when he met ‘Palestinian’ lea-duh Mahmud Abbas and then foreign minister Nabil Shaath in June 2003, the ministers told the documentary series to be broadcast in Britain later this month. (George, did God really say that? See a psychiatrist!)

– that the White House has denied that Warmonger Bush said God told him to invade Iraq and Afghanistan, as a new BBC documentary is expected to reveal. “That’s absurd. He’s never made such comments,” White House spokesman Scott McClellan said. (Even if he did it wouldn’t be to his advantage to admit. But I wouldn’t trust the guys who said Bush said what he said.)

– that a new survey of Muslim students in Britain shows 10% would not inform police if they knew of a fellow Muslim planning a terrorist attack. While 72% said they would inform police right away, some said they ‘would never grass on a Muslim’, according to the poll of 466 students by the Federation of Student Islamic Societies. (There’s something called the sin of omission. Well, probably those 10% has never heard of such a concept.)

– that attacks on a executive’s home and a university show animal rights extremists are growing more violent, a scientists’ group says. Tougher laws had driven a ‘hardcore minority’ to tactics such as arson, the Research Defence Society (RDS) says. It comes after activists admitted firebombing the Bucks home of a Glaxosmithkline executive and a Corpus Christi College, Oxford, building. (Fight for animal rights, yes. But anyone who put animal rights about that of other fellow humans is unworthy to be a member of the human race.)

– that Islamic groups and civil libertarians said the Australia’s new counter-terrorism laws were dangerous, and expressed fears they would be used to attack Muslims. Terrorism suspects will be detained for up to two weeks without charge, and law enforcement agencies will be given extra tracking powers under tough new measures agreed upon. (In Singapore they can detain you indefinitely without charge, so stop whining already!)

– that Australia pressed the Indonesian gover-min to outlaw the terrorist group blamed for the Bali bombings and protested a possible cut in the jail sentence imposed on the group’s alleged ‘spiritual’ lea-duh. Alexander Downer will travel to Indonesia to lobby the gover-min to ban the terrorist group Jemaah Islamiyah (JI) following the latest Bali attacks, John Coward announced. (What are the Indonesians waiting for before they would do the correct thing?)

– that police in northwestern Pakistan have launched an inquiry after complaints about two dead women being declared elected in a local election held recently, election officials said. The women, one of whom died 13 years ago, were elected as councilors in the Upper Dir district in the North West Frontier Province, according to the News daily newspaper. The other woman died three years ago. (Maybe they thought they were electing their representatives in paradise.)

– that Junk-ichiro Konkz-umi said he disagreed with a court ruling that his visits to a controversial war shrine were unconstitutional. “I do not think my visits to Yasukuni shrine violate the constitution,” Konkz-umi said in parliament after a high court in western Japan said the visits contravened the constitutional separation of politics and religion. “It was not like I have made my pilgrimages as part of the prime minister’s official duties. I have paid homage to express my grief over people killed in war and pledge not to cause that kind of war again.” (What’s there to grief about when most of these died invading someone else’s country? Go to the victim countries and express some real grief, Konkz.)

– that Taiwan protested to Internet powerhouse Google for naming the island a province of China in its map section. Foreign ministry spokesman Michel Lu said he was confident Google would change the reference despite possible pressure from China. Describing Taiwan as a province of China ‘is not a fact’, he said. (Calling a fact ‘not a fact’ won’t make it a fact.)

– that Google, the most-used Internet search engine, said its description of Taiwan as a province of China is consistent with international naming conventions such as those followed by the UN. “We rely on international naming conventions to find a consistent policy,” said Ms Debbie Frost, a spokesman for the company based in Mountain View, California. (Doesn’t Taiwan get it? There’s no fighting with China. It’s the economy, stupid!)

– that the Philippine Justice Department ordered an investigation into Corazon Aquino and the Senate president, Franklin Drilon, over an alleged plot to assassinate Gloria Arroyo. (Anyone might resort to assassination, but Cory Aquino? Benigno Aquino would be rolling in his grave if she does that.)

– that the allegation was made by Senator Miriam Santiago. The Arroyo ally claimed to have uncovered a plot engineered by Mrs Aquino and Franklin Drilon to ‘physically remove’ Arroyo if she failed to step down this month. “Of course, physical removal refers to assassination. Hence, I told President Arroyo that she should strengthen her security measures,’ the Manila Times quoted Ms Santiago as saying. (Politicians always never say things literally so they read things literally too.)

– that the Philippines rejected allegations that the masterminds behind the recent bombings in Bali had undergone military training in guerrilla camps run by separatist Muslim rebels on its territory. National police chief director-general Arturo Lomibao said the armed forces had overrun all major terrorist camps in the southern region of Mindanao in recent years, forcing the terrorists to move their bases elsewhere. (Elsewhere in the Philippines where he hasn’t yet found them doesn’t mean it’s no longer in the Philippines.)

– that Abu Bakar Ba-shit, in prison for links to the 2002 Bali bombings, may be among the thousands of prisoners to receive sentence cuts to mark the end of the Islamic fasting month. (No wonder the terror attacks just never end.)

– that a love-lorn soldier could not have known he would provoke ‘moral’ outrage when he kissed his girlfriend goodbye before leaving Aceh in a military pullout, following a peace treaty between the gover-min and separatist group Free Aceh Movement. A picture of the passionate farewell was plastered on the placards of dozens of angry Indonesian women who gathered at the state governor’s office in Banda Aceh to protest against kissing in public. (It makes one wonders how many of these wouldn’t bat an eye if asked to perform oral sex or to kiss their husband’s dicks, in the privacy of their own room !)

Singapore This Week

– that condemning the deadly bomb blasts in Bali, Baby Lee said his meeting this week on the island with SBY would go on as scheduled. (Baby Lee and SBY are after all, once army generals. But for once, well done, Baby!)

– that Baby Lee said, “We have to carry on with the retreat. To change our plans and not to meet is really to concede. We will take the necessary precautions and I’m looking forward to meeting the President.” (Yes. And all JI and similar organisations should not only be banned, but also to make it a capital offense for participation. It doesn’t matter if you did or did not plant a bomb or assist bombers but just joined to pray. As long as you are a member, your punishment is death.)

– that as the gover-min looks at ways to help Singaporeans retire comfortably, Ng Eng Eng said changes to the CPF Investment Scheme (CPF-IS) will be announced within the next two months, with the aim of lowering the cost of investing. Ng said, “We want to introduce a product that has low costs, manageable risks and meaningful returns.” (Ya right. Maybe he can try investing in prostitution. Low cost: A T-shirt and shorts plus a good corner. Manageable Risks: Condoms provided. Meaningful Returns: $60 – $80 per half hour meaningful enough?)

– that some girl students were made to remove the remarks from their Internet diaries, or blogs, and suspended for three days for ‘flaming’ their teachers on the Internet. Their parents were also informed. (Did someone squealed to the teachers or the school something like 3am in the morning?)

– that seven secondary schools and two JCs have asked bloggers who criticise or insult their teachers online – ‘flaming’ in Internet jargon – to remove the offending remarks. One such remark referred to a secondary school teacher as a ‘prude’ for disciplining a student for wearing a too-short skirt. ‘Frustrated old spinster. Can’t stand to see attractive girls’, the blog read. (Well, this girl probably figured that she’ll never get old, ever. It would be poetic justice if she’s condemned to a life of singlehood.)

– that well before the first casino opens for business, a simple rule – with enforcers to back it – will already be in place: No criminal shadows or illegal activities. The Casino Control Bill will be ready as early as next year to spell out the ground rules. Then, in 2007 or the year after, a regulatory body for casinos will be born. (No problem. The next Dai-E-Loan is just around the corner at Geylang. Just call 1800-DAI-E-LOAN. Also, there will be prostitutes girls just standing around harmlessly.)

– that the law may be changed to make it an offence to pay for sex with anyone under 18. The study is part of a wider review of the Penal Code by MHA, which is also studying the feasibility of prosecuting Singaporeans who have sex with minors overseas. The ministry said the review should be completed by the end of the year. Current laws make it a crime to have sex with girls under 16, punishable by up to five years in jail and a $10,000 fine. If passed, the review would make it criminal also to have sex with 16- and 17-year-olds, but only if money, or payment in kind, is involved. (How about increasing the fine for dirty old men too?)

– that the transport operators have estimated an annual revenue loss of about $9 million due to fare evasion on buses. This estimate is arrived at based on the detection rates and the average amount of fare evaded in the cases of underpayment, non-payment and concession abuse as detected during actual ticket checks. Fare evasion takes place on about 1.8% of trips. (Doesn’t matter that this ass-timate makes Singapore a country of cheats.)

– that if transport operators loses $9 million a year, then they lose $24657.53 a day. If every fare cheat has been cheating $1 per trip, we have almost 24,658 cheats a day! (A country of cheats! Will that make it to the guiness book of records?)

– that the LTA claims that public-transport operators do not gain from system faults, as they absorb the revenue losses from undercharging, while commuters can claim full refunds if overcharged. (What happens when commuters did not notice that they are overcharged?)

– that the LTA and the public-transport operators will keep up efforts to reduce the incidence of incorrect fare deductions. Already, improvements to the system have significantly reduced the incidence of incorrect fare deductions to 0.006% of the two million daily ez-link transactions on trunk services, or about 120 cases daily. (So that’s 120 confirmed and reported cases. But what’s the ass-timate on the number of un-reported cases, huh? 50,000 cases a day? 3.7%? Talk about losses and an astronomical estimate is given. Talk about gains and everything so prim and proper. Bah!)

– that defense lawyer Kelvin Lim said, “He (Michael McCrea) tells me he suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder. He has got three exceptions to murder, where we’re hopeful and confident that the charge may be reduced. One of the defences is sudden fight; the other is the exercise of his right for self-defence, and the third is grave and sudden provocation.” (Then he shouldn’t have run in the first place!)

– that even before the ink had dried on the answer scripts, tears started flowing and complaints were made to the media about the PSLE paper on mathematics this year. A kiasu said that the paper was so tough, his daughter and his neighbour’s daughter cried after handing in their answer scripts. He said the questions asked were ‘different in their content’ and ‘nothing close’ to the standard of the school’s prelim paper. Two of the tougher sections also carried a heavy weightage of marks, according to the students. (Whoever said exam papers are supposed to be easy? But considering that Singaporeans whine about speed traps too…)

– that after about a month, the police have closed their investigation into the ‘white-elephants’ incident with a ‘stern warning’ to a veteran grassroots lea-duh. (They would have better spent their time investigating those jokers who are going around pasting posters about alleged abused in China against Far-Long-Gone members.)

– that in a statement to the media, the police said that while the investigation established that there was an infringement of the Public Entertainments and Meetings Act, it noted that ‘the placards did not cause public annoyance or nuisance’. After ‘considering the circumstances’, the police have decided to issue a stern warning to the offender, who was not named. (Will there be a stern warning to the kaypoh who called at an ungodly 3am in the morning too, if I think this guy is an annoyance and a nuisance?)

– that in the competitiveness report released by the Geneva-based World Economic Forum, Singapore is 69th in the health and primary education segment of the rating. (There’s utmost confidence in our nation’s propagandists to turn this around and make it sound like some kind of achievement. Perhaps, something like, the first time we are out of top 50?)

– that Indonesian prostitutes are being brought to work in Geylang by Singaporeans posing as their relatives. They are being paid to do so by a Batam-based vice syndicate. Two women have been arrested following a probe by the CPIB. (And of course, if the prostitutes came willingly, this is not considered as trafficking! Talk about the spirit of the law man!!)

– that this joker left his car unattended along a single-lane, two way road with double jagged yellow lines somewhere in Siglap for a good 10 minutes. (Well, what’s 50 cents of carpark compared to a COE? And why isn’t this in the ‘Ugly Singaporean Award’ section? A chow angmoh was driving this scrap.)

Trivial, Jokes and Thoughts from Discussions

– that a six-month-old labrador pup was recently found alive with a huge double hook through its snout – like the dog above – and another through a leg. The cruel practice takes place on French-controlled Reunion Island in the Indian Ocean. The RSPCA plans to petition the French government, demanding an end to the hideous torture. (Perpetrators of this crime should be hooked by their balls.)

– that actors Demi Whore Moore and Ashton Kutcher were finally married, capping their celebrated two-year older woman, younger man relationship. The wedding was described as a traditional Kabbalah ceremony put together at the last minute. (Anyone taking bets how long this one will last?)

– that Paris Hilton is not ready for the simple life. She said that she ended her five-month engagement to a Greek shipping heir because she is not prepared for marriage and did not want it to end up in divorce. Hilton said she still loves Latsis and they will continue to work together on business endeavours and have ‘movies together in the works’. (Perhaps she decided that she has less to gain that Latsis. Meanwhile in Singapore, Sylvester Sim and Maia Lee… Oh come on! Singapore has been there, done that!)

– that the word ‘toilet’ stems from the French word for ‘little towel’ and was originally a pleasantly indirect way of referring to the place where the chamber pot or its equivalent resides. But toilet has since come to mean the porcelain fixture itself, and so sounds too blunt to use in polite company. (So in the future, when I said I am ‘paying my respects at Yakusuni’, what I really meant is that ‘I am shitting on Japanese Imperialism’.)

– that there’s blogs on the company server! Not the kind of blogs you see on the Internet but work-blogs keeping a daily entry of all the problems encountered daily and what is done to resolved the issues. Makes life hell alot easier for the next guy who takes over the next shift. (Whoever said blogging is all bad?)

– that complaints that iPod nanos scratch and crack with irksome ease has prompted Apple Computer to offer to replace defective screens on the music players, company officials confirmed. (Apparently, the nano isn’t the only thing that is facing quality woes lately. A customer of my friend – a supplier – is so irked by Apple’s ‘non-existent’ service that he has threatened to strip apart his faulty set which is dead on arrival before the Apple support people in the Apple support centre here in Singapore. And I can guess what Mac Freaks would be saying. I just won’t repeat it here.)

– that some recent reports suggests that many people resort to colonic cleansing to keep their digestive system clean. (For Princess Diana to do it, it’s called ‘Royal Flush’. For commoners, is it called a ‘Straight Flush’?)