Hopeless Users (I)

‘Morons like these should be denied the use of technology, even the fire starting tools of the caveman, as even the forest may become endangered.’ – Darth Grievous.

Exerpt #1:

From: Moaner (name changed to protect the stupid)
Sent: 09.04.2008 00:01:06 GMT
To: Desktop and Server Support
Subject: My blackbery is not sinchronising with email – can we get this fixed? That can not be that difficult!

The reason why this moron is frustrated enough to send the above mail was that it has complained that the Blackberry – with 2 r’s please – did not synchronise right away with Outlook the moment it deletes the email from the the Blackberry.

There is really no issue with its Blackberry, really, because the day before the handheld was wiped and updated with the newest version of the handheld software available to SingTel, and the synchronisation options were checked to ensure they are set correctly, and at least 3 test mails sent to ensure that when the mails are deleted either on the handheld or Outlook, it will be synchronised.

What we aren’t aware was the ignorance of the user – our fault for assuming that it would have been difficult to know that being a wireless device, it is unlikely for the Blackberry to be always connected to our network. And even if it is, the distance separating the relay station and the device and our network would have always ensured that there will be a lag… a simple fact that is obvious to most adults and children, and even some of your more discerning domesticated animals.


‘Strike down another with your frustration. Make them miserable along with you!’ – Darth Grievous.

Exerpt #2:

From: Irritating (name changed to protect the stupid)
Sent: 10.04.2008 01:07:34 GMT
To: Desktop and Server Support
Subject: FW: Data Excport is still not working…same error message as before 🙁

Hi

This is really frustating for Chrissy (name changed to protect the innocent) as this was working before

Can we know what is the issue?

Here’s some facts, since you asked.

Firstly, ‘this’ was working before because it was on another machine. Did someone tell you something else on it was broken? I suspect not. But suffice to say that while attempting to get the other problem fixed, my colleague decided it was simpler to just swap the problem machine with another. It doesn’t matter that this is actually the worst solution since it’s more akin to sweeping the dirt under the carpet!

Anyway, whatever remedies we had for the new problem that arose, we tried them and when they failed we attempted to find and follow an email trail to whoever introduced this data export thingie to our company. But thanks to the high turnover rate in your verdammt department, this was impossible! And to make matters worst, we can’t test the changes we made until the next day when this task is to run again. Meantime, your own colleagues have gotten it completed on another machine that worked because there’s a dateline to it.

So, that’s the issue to this so damned frustrating matter. And thank you very much for sharing it with me by sending this dumb mail of yours 7 minutes into the day’s start, to the common mailbox read also by my bosses, and made it sounds like all of us haven’t or aren’t doing anything all along to get this blasted problem resolved!

An April Fool’s Joke – One Week Late

The news that the SMRT won the ‘Best Passenger Experience’ award came to my attention when I saw Ridzuan’s twitter. I subsequently followed the link on his ‘Twit’ and read this post.

Below please see the news reproduced from CNA.

SMRT wins international award for “Best Passenger Experience”

SINGAPORE: Transport operator SMRT has clinched the “Best Passenger Experience” award at the inaugural Metro Awards 2008 in Copenhagen, Denmark.

Metro Awards is part of MetroRail, an annual conference of the urban rail industry worldwide which met from 1 to 3 April this year.

Other finalists of the “Best Passenger Experience” award included Copenhagen Metro, MTR Corporation Limited (Hong Kong) and The Warsaw Metro Ltd.

They were judged on factors such as value for money, efficiency and reliability, as well as cleanliness and security.

SMRT said the international award for service excellence came shortly after it won the “Most Customer-Friendly Transport” award, presented by Singapore’s Land Transport Authority.

This is almost certainly funny, and like Sicarii said, ‘If this had come out on 1 April, I’d have brushed it off as an April Fool’s joke.’ .

However, when these – value for money, efficiency and reliability, as well as cleanliness and security – are used as key performance indicators (KPIs), then indeed our MRT is damned kriffing World Class Worse Class, even though I wonder how it did beat Hong Kong in terms of efficiency. Above which, as far as reliability is concerned, the recent 7-hour disruption of service affects only people living in the East, and it isn’t in itself a system wide failure.

But what is missing in the KPI is of course, customer feedback. And I doubt any such awards would want to take that into consideration because every city will have their gripes about their subway system. I personally don’t want to go into that again, since I rave and rant about it only recently.

Anyway, I had a really good laugh from this though poor Ridzuan’s views on Twitter were not very well received in some quarters. But of course his detractors are entitled to be happy with the best they can get from among the bad just as much as we wished for the better.

However, please stop telling us that you felt it is good enough for you – because I really don’t give a flying fxxk if you think shit is good enough for you as food too. You are always entitled to eat that! On top of that, we may perhaps be frogs in the well who should get out more often because we haven’t seen nothing yet, but you are not the one feeling how I feel, though I would be happy if you can invent a device so I can channel them to you such that I won’t feel anything.

In fact, I am really not sure what you have to lose to allow us to ask for a better subway service – such as a higher train frequency – since won’t you benefit from that as well?

Perhaps the only thing you got to lose is paying more for it. And in my opinion, the fares goes up annually anyway so you might as well ask for something!

Superhero Dreams!

Kenna ‘sabo-ed’ (aka tagged) by Daphnemaia to do this meme…

Super Hero

  1. Superhero power I want – Force Choke
  2. Why? – Choke incompetent people to death without having to wrap my hands around their scrawny little necks.
  3. Downside of this power – Charges for murder / Crimes against humanity.
  4. My superhero nickname – Darth Grievous.
  5. My motto – You have failed me for the last time.
  6. Sworn Enemy – The Incompetent Moron.
  7. Official vehicle – ‘Super’ Class Star Destroyer. (So when I can’t choke you, I’ll raze your home to the ground by orbital bombardment.)
  8. Day job – IT. I’ll reboot your computer remotely for your lack of faith…


10 Things About Me That Might Freak You Out

  1. I talk to and scold my computer.
  2. I can lose my temper in… 30s and rage for 10 minutes without rest.
  3. I can rave and rant about the gahmen in public without any reservation.
  4. I can scold Hokkien vulgarities in 12 syllabus instead of 7.
  5. I eat faster than most people… if you consider swallowing ‘eating’.
  6. I have an elephant memory… until I get even.
  7. When you are not on my side of my fight, step aside and don’t get in the way.
  8. I believe the Tali-PAP mini$ter$ are just a bunch of money grabbing mofos and a just death for them would be that of Judas Iscariot.
  9. I believe we need a new gahmen, one not run by the Tali-PAP.
  10. All Tali-PAP lackeys should be executed… by firing squad… with a 155mm Howitzer.

I am not gonna tag anyone. So, don’t worry about it.

A good reason for ‘lim jiu’…

Helping ugly people have sex since 1821

Now, that’s a damned good reason to lim jiu!!! And generally speaking, beer is just one of the alcoholic drinks to get your there. There are stronger ones to get your there even sooner, if that’s what you are looking for. 😛

And if you think you are handsome / beautiful and you won’t need that to help you, just take it as an enhancement to get you there even faster.

Talking about which… we should have a ping.sg lim jiu session one of these days. Maybe get foxtwo, arzhou and uzyn to do it together with one of arzhou’s home made brew… kekekeke….

And for the dirty minds out there… Don’t be disgusting!! The four of us are definitely not going to have sex with one another when we get high…

Do they actually know what to fix in our transport system?

This post is modified from a comment I posted on one of Ignorant Soup’s blog post.


He is dead right on this matter. People buy a car for 2 simple reasons – the public transport sucks and they really needed one (people who do sales for e.g.). In fact, I suspect Uzyn, the founder of ping.sg, would be in a better position to tell us why he bought a car too!

Here are some examplesof the gripes about our world class transport:

  1. I saw on Twitter the other day, a pingster (I think it was DK) talking about the MRT trip from Bugis to Somerset in which he wasted 11mins – waiting. And to think of it, I think there’s really not much time gained between taking the MRT to Funan Centre from Raffles Place compared to walking there too, when the weather is good.
  2. There was a day when I took the MRT from Dhoby Gaut to Little India in which the trip is 1.5mins and I spent more than 4 min waiting. It must have been absurd to some that I complained about the waiting time when it takes less time compared to the bus. But having the waiting time to be almost 3 times the travelling time is quite absurd on its own!
  3. There was another day I needed a bus from Fullerton Hotel to Marina Square because I was late and I end up waiting 20 mins for either bus 97 / 75 when several 131s, 100s, 10s, and 196s (plus even a 70, which comes every 20 mins) went past. Had I walked (and I would have when the weather isn’t so blasted warm), I would have reached way ahead anyway.
  4. Take also the bus 157 or 198 coming out of Boon Lay Interchange. Try taking a ride on either of these buses during the morning peak hours, and I can assure you that you won’t get out of Jurong even after 20mins because it prowls Jurong West and Jurong East Ave 1. And when we have a spoke and hub system, why are these inter-town buses prowling the routes where feeders are already prowling… again? And in fact, won’t this be a clear indication that the spoke and hub system is inefficient and the feeder bus system should be done away with completely?
  5. Then look at bus 51 which travels out of Jurong East to Hougang. It goes around Pasir Panjang, Alexandra Road, Queensway, Alexandra Road again, Havelock Road, China Town, Hill Street.. * yawn * I assure you anyone who has tried making a trip from Jurong East to Hougang on this bus should really bring a bottle of water and ignore the no eating / drinking rule because you might die of thirst when the bus reach Hougang… 1.5 ~ 2hrs later! I wonder, can we even find one inter-town bus that can get you between them in about half an hour?
  6. The MRT – Does the LTA not know that the satellite town concept means there’s a low turnover of passengers in between stations? For e.g. if you use the N-S line northbound, you will notice that almost every station there’s a nett gain of commuters until Toa Payoh onwards? Or the E-W line westbound, you will notice that the trains are usually packed until Jurong East?

In short, this gahmen is talking out of its arse when it talks about a world class system without considering just how this blasted system that meets the generic performance matrix is in complete shambles when you include it’s true performance and daily commuter comfort for those travelling to work. In fact, I am not surprise that it takes most Singaporeans – without the luxury of moving like our Fallen Talents – about 45mins to an hour traveling between home and work. And that’s just only one way.

Please, don’t tell me to find a job that’s near home because jobs I don’t take are taken up by Foreign Fallen Talents in a blink and with much lower wages too!

Finally, it doesn’t take much for one to ask just how ‘World Worse Class‘ it is when the very guys who said so won’t even set an example to use it daily! How justified can the fare hikes really be, when the people who approves them generally only take public transports once in awhile? And I don’t even want to get started about taxis all over again, since I have talked about them before.

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